Rocking the Plate started out as a little lark of a post, just something we threw up for our own entertainment, and gave way to one of our most memorable comment threads. Summer being the time for reruns, we’ve posted the best of those propositions after the jump, along with responses we received from the blogosphere’s finest.
Chad’sMyGuy: “This is one of the greatest questions to ask, it really tells a lot about a person, and makes for great conversation. That, and what your endzone celebration be. With the said, my song would be “Jane Says” (Live version, of course), and the handing of the ball to the ref. I would love to do something Chad Johnson-ish, but I would be too busy smacking asses to care.”
Burnsy: “I’m so torn. I mean, do I go with Motorhead’s “Born to Raise Hell” or Avril Lavigne’s “Girlfriend”?”
ATL Rock: “Without doubt my choice would be “Memphis Will Be Laid to Waste” by Norma Jean. The first 20 seconds are unmatched in my opinion. The screaming might scare the kiddies though . . . ”
MJD: “Truly, Madly, Deepy. Savage Garden.”
T. Kyle King: “For me, the answer is easy: Warren Zevon’s “Lawyers, Guns, and Money.””
Bristlesage: “I’ve never considered my at-bat music, but I have decided that my closer music would be “Barracuda” by Heart. Heart doesn’t get enough respect, maaaaan.”
Disco Stu: “…I shouldn’t be one to give advice, since my at-bat music would be “Touch Me When I’m Dancing” by the Carpenters.”
HG: “I would probably have M.O.P.’s Ante Up playing when I stepped into the box.. Either that or R Kelly’s Bump and Grind, just to throw everybody off..”
Lt. Winslow: “For Whom The Bell Tolls (the song kicks in around 3:55). Love it when I’m lifting, love it when I’m jogging, I’m sure I would love it when approaching the plate.”
Signal to Noise: “I’m going Canadian for this, and I think I’ve mentioned it before: Danko Jones’ “We Sweat Blood.””
Sheena Beaston: “i’d definitely go with “Gloria” by laura branigan
reasons being:
1. that song kills…literally, it shreds faces off
2. opposing pitcher would be so perplexed by my song choice that #3 occurs
3. confused mound-man tosses an eephus
4. to which i reply with a monster crush and start singing “…i think i got your number……..(substitute pitcher’s name for Gloria)””
Goathair: “Scentless Apprentice by Nirvana. The drums just rock my face off.”
Rob M: “I know somebody has to use it but I would still take Public Enemy & Anthrax – Bring the Noise. The first 12 seconds is all you need.”
The Legend of Vincent Tremblay: “I’ll go for a RATM song if yinz won’t: “Bomb Track”. It has a little extra crunch that works better for a slugger than a closer.”
TheGoldfishCowboy: “Can I have “The Cha Cha Slide”… but not just a clip… I need the whole 8 minutes to prepare to bat.
\hands on ya knees, hands on ya kneeees”
DCTrojan: “Since I am possibly the world’s worst baseball player, it’s not something I’ve ever paused to think about. I would be torn between “Bomber” by Motorhead and “Do or Die” by the Super Furry Animals.
In reality, my only chance of making it to first base would be as a result of 4 balls, making the appropriate track “(You gotta walk) Don’t look back” by the inimitable Peter Tosh, accompanied for some reason by Mick Jagger. ”
JebusHChrist: “The theme from Dawson’s Creek. I want the pitcher to know who he’s dealing with when The Daddy steps into the box.
I’ll make him laugh, I’ll make him cry, and I’ll take him deep.
There’s no way he can focus on location when he’s thinking of the Dawson, Joey, and Pacey menage a trois. No way.”
Orson Swindle: “I just want to go to Turner Field. And come out in front of all those fucking rednecks to the tune of “Gay Bar.” You think Kid Rock is hard? No–that is hard. As hard as a man’s rigid, needy cock. Though I do like the part where Kid Rock says his name in every song.”
Jamie Mottram: “While I’m a proponent of closer songs, I hope MLB isn’t long for batting songs. Brief blasts of (usually bad) music while enjoying a ballgame just doesn’t do it for me. That said, Ryan Zimmerman damn near killed me with ‘Ridin’ Dirty’ for the duration of 2006, and BJ Surhoff endeared himself to me even further by batting to The Smiths for something like five straight seasons. As for me, I’d need a rotation, maybe a handful of songs … one for each at-bat on any given gameday. Let’s go with ‘Drive Slow’ (Kanye West), ‘The Underdog’ (Spoon), ‘Driver’s Seat’ (Sniff ‘n’ Tears’), ‘Can’t You Hear Me Knockin’ (The Rolling Stones) and ‘Definition’ (Black Star) for now. Of course, I’d need to change the rotation every homestand and probably catalog them all via a playlist on iTunes, because, if I was a ballplayer, people like me would actually care.”
Mike: “Rage Against the Machine – Bulls On Parade. You’re only getting about 9-11 seconds of song in prior to the at-bat so you have to bring the gas early and often. No better opening in my mind, dirty, surly, mean. That 10 seconds of music is the aural equivalent of taking the pitchers mother home, banging her eight ways from Sunday, then dropping her off at home plate, a quivering shell of her former self. You tell me another song that’s gonna pop off enough to give Curtis Pride shivers.”
Moonshine Mike: “No one singing’s Bikini Girl’s version of “Rebel Girl” (with joan jett on backing vocals)? sigh.”
Ladies... 
I forgot how hilarious these were. Good compilation, Holly.
“Hey, hey, you, you, I don’t like your girlfriend…”
BANG!
As for me, I’d need a rotation, maybe a handful of songs … one for each at-bat on any given gameday. Let’s go with ‘Drive Slow’ (Kanye West), ‘The Underdog’ (Spoon), ‘Driver’s Seat’ (Sniff ‘n’ Tears’), ‘Can’t You Hear Me Knockin’ (The Rolling Stones) and ‘Definition’ (Black Star) for now. Of course, I’d need to change the rotation every homestand and probably catalog them all via a playlist on iTunes, because, if I was a ballplayer, people like me would actually care.”
Several of the Mets do this.
I’ve been thinking about this, and I’d prob go with some Spanish music. I love Don Omar’s Salio El Sol and of course, I’d have to pick some perico ripiao’ (Dominican Republic’s folk music) (probably Juan Luis Guerra’s El Farolito, just for the beginning).
And yes, I realize that most of you have no idea what I’m talking about.
Burnsy – You going to dress as both the pitcher and the catcher for the video?
If anyone missed it, Throwbot found the Wikipedia list of songs for players. I’m highly disappointed in the number of Nickelback selections.
Sorry TSW but I feel like I’m walking into a trap if I answer that question.
I’m highly disappointed in the number of Nickelback selections.
That is disappointing. Blech, Nickelback.
Metsy – yes, blech to Nickelback. Also, some more creativity would be nice. The number of players allowed to use “This Is Why I’m Hot” at one time should be capped.
Mo Ensberg came out to One Step Beyond by Madness earlier this year…. it almost made me forget that he was swating a robust .223 at the time.
As usual, Orson wins.
Pat Burrell’s song (Dirty Laundry) only makes me love him more.
Previously I had put down the much inferior “Balls to the Walls”. But now I realize what I truly want is the Gipsy King’s version of “Hotel California,” just like in THE BIG LEBOWSKI.
Except everything would have to go slow-mo.
And I’d have to lick the bat in the same way John Turturro did with the bowling ball.
Trapped in the closet – R Kelly – 1 act per at bat. Guaranteed to get a HBP
TSB, that’s goddamn brilliant. I have a friend who wants to find a way to broadcast that over all the iPods on a train car, so they’ll know that she’s stepped in.
I don’t even remember writing that. How silly!
The Nickelback selections just shows that while they may be hotties, they need a Lady to show them style and taste…