From the insane amount of “Riley Skinner” searches over the past couple of days, it’s obvious what you want: uncensored naked pictures of the Skinner flute. Unfortunately, we can’t find them, despite spending approximately seven hours googling him (not a euphemism).
But because we love you the mostestest, we’re offering you the next best thing: the chance to make your own with our official Ladies… Build-A-Skinner.
Print out the template after the jump and draw your own, um, little Deacon. Or big Deacon. Or an “I promise, this hasn’t ever happened before. I guess he’s just shy.” Deacon. Your call. Continue reading →
So maybe you’ve seen the nekkid pics of Wake Forest QB Riley Skinner that have been racing around the internets. If not, you can probably find it…oh…maybe…here.
Now that you’ve seen them, I would like to apologize. I didn’t mean to for this to happen. See, I was at Riley’s playing Scattergories and watching The Dog Whisperer when he asked if I’d like to see his collection of camouflage hats. We went to his bedroom, one thing led to another, and we ended up checking each other for ticks. Innocent enough, right? But before he could say “does this rash look like a bullseye?”, I’d accidentally taken a picture. And then, like, my Sidekick was hacked or something. But, since that one shot is already out there, I guess you should see the other ones I took too. Continue reading →
So I took a break from my thrillicious morning (read: applying for middle management jobs at Tire Kingdom) to check out the The Game Plan, the latest escapee from the Disney DVD vault, starring The “Dwayne Johnson” Rock. Mr. Rock plays Joe Kingman, the QB of the Boston Rebels who loves himself, football, and Elvis—in that order—although his Elvis worship is perhaps based on their mutual nickname, “The King”. The Rebels have plowed through their opponents to reach the playoffs of the Unnamed-For-Copyright-Reasons football league and Joe is a big part of their success, mainly because he refuses to pass to his teammates in favor of running in all of the touchdowns himself.*
It just takes one glance at the suitcase-toting pixie beside him on the DVD case, and we can surmise that things are going to change for Joe**, that he won’t be spending many more evenings alone, watching and re-watching Sportcenter segments about himself (which is how I imagine Terrell Owens spends his free time).
The night after a party involving Russian models and, um, teammates leaving early to get home to their families (Right, like you expected Playmakers), Joe answers a knock at his door and learns that the girl standing in the hall is the result of one of his, um, naked bootlegs. Now before you spew some Tom Brady/Matt Leinart-style snark, allow me to point out that Joe was married to her mother, Sarah, and they were divorced before she knew she’d been quarterback sneaked. And she’s now off providing fresh drinking water to the drought-ravaged children of the Sudan***, so don’t hate. Continue reading →
Michael Cera in Superbad. Justin Long in Dodgeball. Seth Rogen in Knocked Up. We pull for these guys to get the girls, because who doesn’t love a little pluck and moxie in a man? After the jump, find out why Holly and J-Money have given their hearts to New York and San Diego for the duration of the playoffs.
Ah, the first of the new year. It’s that great day to kiss your sweetie (or that really hot guy standing to your left) at midnight, watching the bowl games (or outdoor hockey), and to make a fresh start in your life.
Or something like that.
Yes, last week was that time to make a whole bunch of resolutions to yourself. I know, you’ve already resolved to lose weight and to stop drinking as much and finally start saving your money for a rainy day. Let’s be honest, you’re not going to do any of that. You would have already. How about making some logical resolutions this year? I will not hate the Yankees with a white hot fire. I will appreciate Alabama for its continued devotion to a dead coach. I won’t defecate in a cooler. All the things you know you can do.
If you’re at a loss as to what you should resolve this year, read the Ladies… 2008 resolutions for some ideas. I’m sure you’ll be able to adopt some of our ideas. And if not, good luck with that whole less drinking thing. Continue reading →