News so fantastic, it had to announced in ALL CAPS without spaces between words and punctuated with THREE exclamation points: the stupid, stupid NFL lockout is officially OVER! Commence the planning of fantasy drafts and opening weekend tailgate spreads post haste.
Just to summarize:
8 innings pitched
1.3 glasses of merlot (contemplated drinking straight from the bottle at 7-0)
1/3 bag of Lays’ reduced salt chips
8 middle fingers (mostly for Josh Hamilton)
Damn you, Cliff Lee. Damn you to hell.
(I hate that you’re so awesome.)
…Roy Halladay. Do I even need to say anything else?
HI EVERYONE ROY HALLADAY THREW A NO HITTER IN HIS FIRST POSTSEASON APPEARANCE AND I HAVE LOST THE ABILITY TO USE PUNCTUATION
PS IT WAS ONLY THE SECOND ONE IN A LITTLE THING WE LIKE TO CALL HISTORY
PS NUMBAH TWO: OH AND HE THREW A PERFECT GAME THIS YEAR ALREADY.
For real, I kind of think my husband would be okay if I left him for Roy. Actually, I kind of think he might leave me for Roy. I’m not sure I blame him.
If you haven’t already, go read this article from Beyond the Box Score.
IT MAKES STEPS TOWARDS QUANTIFYING CATCHER DEFENSE.
Yes, that’s a random photo. But it’s a neat image. So there.
Try to survive the night.
(Aaaaahhhhh someone is quantifying catcher defense!!!)
Oh, and, uh, guys? I promise I’ll say something interesting over the weekend. Just a thought to get you excited for my upcoming angry ramblings and rants: Who do you think is having the best season? Andy LaRoche, Jason Bay, or Manny Ramirez?
After this paragraph, I’ve got just 50 words to fill you in on the big sports stories from Sunday. For the record, I’ll count a game’s score as one word (so “2-1″ is one word). Since there are lots of photos, I made them small, but you can click each photo to see the full-size version. Here we go!
Throat slashed, Wings win. Continue reading
We’re going to try something new here: After this introductory paragraph, I’ve got 50 words to fill you in on all the Opening Day happenings from around the Majors. For the record, I’ll count a game’s score as one word (so “2-1” is one word). Here we go!