2. You play in the AL East and your mascot could be studied by zoologists, but not ethologists. I had to clarify that to save us all from the inevitable comments about the behavioral tendencies of Red Sox or Yankees fans.
3. Your owner is paying his lawyers a higher monthly salary than any of his players. (Second item) Not that this prevented the Dodgers from sweeping my Cardinals this week but … that’s another (long and cranky) blog post.
4. Strange injuries are befalling your team. Your shortstop trips over a rope (why is a rope on a baseball field?) and sprains his thumb. Your outfielder gets a MOTH. IN HIS EAR. Seriously, baseball gods. Cardinals fans are well aware of what the standings are, we do not need all these signs and portents.
5. You win a game and people blame you for an earthquake.
Sigh. Is it football season yet?