Bears Training Camp: A Fruitless Search for Autographs

Today, I accompanied my sister, brother-in-law and nephew to Bourbonnais, Ill., for Chicago Bears training camp. Being there reaffirmed one of my strongest beliefs: nothing is hotter than a football player in pads. I also learned that is much harder to get an autograph than you would think. (They weren’t for me – they’re for my nephew!)

Long snapper and hottie, Patrick Mannelly

Long snapper and hottie, Patrick Mannelly

Rex Grossman is much better looking in person than on TV or in pictures. He and Kyle Orton (also better looking better in person) both spent a long time signing autographs for kids.

These, skanks nice young women had Brian Urlacher and Greg Olsen’s numbers painted on their stomachs. One held a sign that said “Will you marry me Brian?” My sister pointed out that if she married and divorced him, he wouldn’t pay child support, so why bother? The other woman’s sign read “I love your tight end, Greg!” You stay classy, ladies.

Alex Brown, photographer

Tommie Harris

Tommie Harris

Tommie Harris and Alex Brown have the exact right attitude about fans at camp. They had so much fun with everyone. Brown spent ten minutes with his own camera (I think) taking pictures of the crowd. Harris played the two sides of the players’ area against each other, getting the crowd to chant his name. He also took off his shoes, signed them, and gave them to kids, then took Greg Olsen’s gloves from him, made Greg sign them, signed them himself, and gave them to kids. It was really cool – rookies, especially you rookies who walked right by the kids today, take note. That’s how you should act.

Grizzly Olson

Grizzly Olson

Speaking of Olsen, he’s cuter on camera. I’m not digging the beard.



I wasn’t around when Devin Hester or Brian Urlacher went by, but Robbie Gould got the biggest cheer that I heard. People LOVE him here. I’d like to point out his nice arms-he’s a kicker!

For this young man, I spent the past twenty minutes going through the Bears roster trying to figure out who he is, and I can’t figure it out. But if I have one rule in life, it’s this. When a hot Bear walks by showing off his abs, I take a picture. It’s that simple.

Now, here is my sad story about autographs. I staked out what I thought was a good spot on the fence to get Payton, whom you have met before, some autographs. After standing there for about 45 minutes, waiting for practice to end, some of the people working the camp brought in a bunch of kids in front of us, and put up a rope in front of them. Basically, we had no shot at autographs. I have a picture of Payton when he realized that he was not going to get an autograph, but it was too sad to post. So if anyone out there in cyberworld can help me get some Bears’ autographs, where it won’t cost me an arm and a leg (I am a broke grad student/school employee/blogger, after all), please contact me at chicksheartfights AT gmail DOT com. (I know it’s shameless begging, but it’s for my nephew.)

7 thoughts on “Bears Training Camp: A Fruitless Search for Autographs

  1. Tommie Harris is my favorite Bear. He is awesome at life. Sorry about the autographs, though. That is a bummer.

    By the way he is carrying his pads, your mystery Bear looks like his name might be Cutty McCuttington.

  2. Aww Chitown that sucks. Poor kid.

    I’m somewhat of an avid autograph seeker, and it is not an easy game to play. (I haven’t braved the world of pro football, I’m way to scared to try at training camp). I collect every autograph for my personal collection, and not to be sold.

    If I had Chicago Bears stuff I’d give it to you!

  3. It’s neat to find out Tommie Harris is great with the fans. Living in Big 12 country, I always hope those players do well in the NFL and don’t end up overrated, and of course it is a super bonus when a very gifted athlete is also a very nice guy who appreciates the fruits of his accomplishments.

  4. The blonde on her knes looks like she’s been there before. I’d bend her over and lick her crack after the blow job. Then eat that tight little clit, then blow my cock up her butt.

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