I feel so dirty. But I like it.

So I’ve been watching a lot of NBA basketball lately. The Playoffs are actually exciting this year and well there really aren’t any other regularly televised sports that I want to watch. So as I was watching the first game of the Orlando-Detroit second round series and I found myself thinking bad, bad thoughts. Thoughts that I knew I shouldn’t be thinking. Thoughts for which I knew my friends would ridicule me. Thoughts that may very well damn my eternal soul. But there they were, floating around in my brain nonetheless. What should I do about them? Should I divulge these awful thoughts, these vile feelings? Should I let the world in on my dirty little secret? Will I be able to forgive myself for openly admitting to such blasphemous tendencies? I’ll let you be the judge…


Like really hot. Like “as I searched for photos for this post I was even more convinced of his hotness” hot.

Image “borrowed” from jjredick.net

There. I said it. Judge away. Now can you see why I am so conflicted? He’s J.J. stinking Redick. He is a minion of the anti-Christ. HE PLAYED FOR DUKE. Not only did he play for them, he holds like all of their scoring records. His jersey hangs in those most cursed rafters. There is an excellent chance that he thinks Rat-boy Mike Kszeoawejfsasdki is a good person. He is probably a total douche bag. He cries. He writes poetry. He flashes the “shocker” sign after hitting threes. To top it off, he’s not even a good pro player! He’s done little more than ride the pine pony for last 2 seasons (although he did get some decent minutes in the last few games of the regular season). He has such awe-inspiring stats as 4.1 ppg, .5 apg, .7 rpg. And yet, I want to make babies with him. Overly gelled hair be damned!

What are you trying to tell the crowd here, J.J.?

Dep Ultimate Hold Gel. He clearly went a little nuts with it.

I am a bad Tar Heel. I probably shouldn’t be allowed to wear Carolina Blue. My one and only defense is that I didn’t go to UNC when he played for Duke. I never saw him play. In fact, I never watched a game where he played at Duke. Not even on TV. I lived in a “sucky basketball school” bubble, and hence rarely even watched college basketball prior to moving to the great state of North Carolina. But I know that I’m wrong. I know there is no hope for us. What would we talk about? He would start sentences with, “So while I was at Duke…” and I would probably do something super mature like stick my fingers in my ears and go “Lalalalalalala”. But we could have dirty secret sex. No one has to know I love him. Well, except the entire internet…

This just screams, ” I know you love me, and that you hate it. I’m okay with that. See you in the hotel room in 10 mintutes…”

So what’s the verdict kids, damned for all eternity? Or can you forgive this lapse in judgment and loyalty? I mean look at him! He’s adorable. I can hardly be blamed.

30 thoughts on “I feel so dirty. But I like it.

  1. That’s it. We’ll be putting your ovaries into cold storage until you can learn to be responsible with them.

    Good God; the amount of smarm in that last picture alone should require declaring this blog to be a Superfund site.

  2. This was a hard post for me to write. But as I was watching the game I started googling pics of him, and I mean look at him. I can’t help it. He may be one of satan’s minions, but I think I’m okay with that :)

    That is still one of my favorite pics of all time.

  3. @Tuffy
    What can I say? I love me some smarm! And a message from my ovaries: “We do what we want!”

  4. @Lady Andres
    I am right there with you. I would be the meat and or cheese in that hot sandwich. Tyler is future husband. JJ is secret affair.

  5. I never really liked JJ. Even when he was at Duke I couldn’t really stand him, which is just weird. I mean, I appreciate what he did and realize where he stands in the Duke record books, but man there was just something I never fully got attached to.

  6. No JJ/Tyler*, but JJ/Gerald? Yeeaaaaaah, baby.

    *It is not in me to find any TarHole attractive. Those gay argyles turn me off. You are a bigger woman than me, Christina. The only NC I could even IMAGINE having hate sex with would be the one that does College GameDay. Hubie Something?

  7. I never thought I would see the day someone agreed with me about the unbelievable hotness that would be a JJ/Tyler sandwich. They both come off as being slight asshats… but I dont have to like them to want to get on them.

    And dont feel bad about liking JJ… I find myself somewhat attracted to McRoberts (he looks better now that he has stopped mimicking Fog Horn Leg Horn’s hair do).

  8. You know you’re my girl, Stina. But. Really? I mean, really?

    If you want someone of the type – pale skin, dark hair – I’d point you towards (after a cursory google image search) Eduardo Najera. Handsome (though not photogenic), apparently one of the best guys ever (check out all the charity work), with a certain edge on the court (and by that I mean he fouls a lot).

    Or Chris Anderson, who, while not dark-haired, is shirtless.

  9. Personally, I think his looks improved simply because he’s not wearing the Duke uni anymore. *snerk!*

  10. @La
    Ooh shirtless boy. Who is he? Hate the pube patch on his chin. And the weirdo tats. But he’s cute other than that. Also not into the Najera. Not enough smarm for my taste :)

    Infinitely hotter without the Duke uni!

  11. @Stina – shirtless boy is Chris Andersen, The Birdman, and yeah, he’s kind of dopey. And by dopey I mean he smokes cannabis. And by smokes cannabis I mean got kicked out of the league for it. Guess that explains the silly tattoos (and I like boys with ink) and unfortunate facial hair. Back in the league, too, with the Hornets. Always, always watch the West for hottie-spotting.

    And Eduardo’s always seemed kind of arrogant to me, which makes him hotter. Does that count? :D

  12. I’m again late to the party, but JJ-Tyler sandwich? Up until about two months ago, I woulda. Psycho-T now makes me vomit, but I’ve liked JJ since his sophomore year! And I’m a UConn fan, so we kicked his sorry (but adorable) butt in 2004 and I grew to love him even more (hey, that rhymes.) I took this amazing picture of him during that game and I want to frame it, but it’s more arty-amazing than close-up-amazing.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s