Here we are again. I had to rank the Cubs and Red Sox pretty high this week because I go strictly by their records because I find that funny. I guess I have to stick with it. Grumble grumble harumph harumph.
1st place: Arizona Diamondbacks at 13-5. Wow. Huh.
2nd place: Chicago Cubs at 12-6. Half of their wins have come against the Pirates. So really they’re a .500 team.
Theriot and Fontenot, the Shakespearean Cubbies.
3rd place: Boston Red sox at 13-7. They only vaulted up here because they’ve taken 3 straight from the lowly Rangers. They still got swept by the Blue Jays.
4th place: St. Louis Cardinals at 12-7. They lost two in a row for the first time this season. Tis but a scratch!
WOOO!
5th place: Florida Marlins, Milwaukee Brewers, Chicago White Sox at 11-7. In order: the Marlins are hanging right in there, aren’t they? Milwaukee has two big games with St. Louis the next two days; the Cubs rejoice. The White Sox are about to host 3 games with the Yankees and then 4 with the Orioles. That will be very telling about whether or not they are legit.
8th place: Oakland Athletics and Los Angeles Angels at 12-8. I wonder how long this dog-fight in the AL West can continue?
10th place: New York Mets at 10-7. You’re a half game behind the Marlins. That’s weird, huh?
11th place: Baltimore Orioles at 11-8. Seriously…what the fuck? When do they start sucking? They just took 2 out of 3 from the Yankees. Black is white, up is down.
12th place: Toronto Blue Jays at 10-9. See above.
13th place: New York Yankees, Seattle Mariners, Colorado Rockies, Atlanta Braves at 10-10 or 9-9. In order: aww poor Awod is hut and now yu are fwive hundwed. Can I even name a Mariner who is not named Ichiro? Hmm…nope. Meh, kind of over God’s Team. The Braves are riding a 4-game winning streak and about to host the lowly Nationals for 2 games. Should get them caught up with the Mets.
17th place: Kansas City Royals, Minnesota Twins, San Diego Padres, Philadelphia Phillies at 9-10. In order: The Royals were rollin’ until dropping 4 straight. I hope they can right the ship. The Twins? Meh. The Padres: Maddux and Peavy and pray for…a break in the leavy? …I got nothing. Phillies: about to go on a fairly easy road trip to Colorado, Milwaukee and Pittsburgh. By next week’s rankings they should be 14-12.
Mmmm, Peavy.
21st place: Cincinnati Reds, San Francisco Giants, Tampa Bay Rays at 8-11. The Reds are back to their rightful place in the NL Central. 50% of the Giants’ wins have come from the Cardinals. Dammit. The Rays…are bad.
24th place: Pittsburgh Pirates, Los Angeles Dodgers at 7-11. When do the Cardinals get to feast on the carcass of the Pirates like the Cubs have? The Dodgers? Meh.
26th place: Texas Rangers, Houston Astros, Cleveland Indians at 7-12. I really don’t particularly care about any of these teams.
29th place: Detroit Tigers at 6-13. HEY! NOT LAST PLACE ANYMORE! WOOOO!
30th place: Washington Nationals at 5-14. They are 2-14 over the last 2.5 weeks. That brand-new ballpark deserves better.
Awww, poor Nationals Park…
Hm, I was all sleepy, but Peavy woke me right up. Good evening, sir!
Dusty Baker = poophouse. Write it down.
not last place!!!!!!!!
No, that’s “Damn Yankees”. You were looking for “Awesome Cubs”.
Not to mention, awesomely hot Cubs.
Don’t worry. My beloved O’s will blow it by the All-Star Break. Angelos will make sure of it.
Not last place! Not last place!
I’m going to be chanting that all day. And Son of Grander might be back this week!
The Royals have fallen to under .500.
Sigh.
and arrrrrmando galarrrrrrraga. We should get a bump just for that!
No hating on the Cubs. First place is first place!
Ex-squeeze me? 12th place?! Well, I’ll be damed…
Quit the cubbie hatting!!!
No, I will not. Cuck the Fubs.
Cuck the Fubs indeed.
GO SOX!
go cubs go…hey chicago what do you say…
the cubbies are ok looking. anyone catch the game today?
I caught a bunch of it on the radio. Hey Chicago, what do you say, indeed.