Heat Hottie (heh heh) Dwyane Wade is back in the lineup for Miami. Unfortunately, I had him on my bench last night so his 15 points, 5 assists and 3 steals were all for naught (at least in my little world. And let’s be honest, fantasy basketball is all that matters here, people). [He’s Back, He’s Back! HER-CA-LEES! HER-CA-LEES!]
Marijuana Hottie Ricky Williams has been reinstated into the NFL. The 0-9 Dolphins are planning on starting rookie quarterback John Beck (I know…WHO?) at Philadelphia on Sunday, so perhaps Ricky will get right back into the action. I mean, he can’t make it any worse, can he? [He’s Back, He’s Back! REEFER MAN! REEFER MAN!]
For those of you who live under a rock (and I don’t judge…I’m currently picking out a nice refrigerator box to live in when I graduate and have no job), Waffler Hottie Alex Rodriguez has decided that he really likes the Yankees best out of all his suitors and is going to stay in NYC. [He’s Back, He’s Back! JETER’S BFF! JETER’S BFF!]
And speaking of not being able to quit New York, Batshit Crazy Hottie Stephon Marbury decided his tiff with Isiah Thomas is not enough to keep him from…continuing to lose with the New York Knickerbockers. He tried his darndest to help them win, but the $180,000 fine he paid to come back must’ve thrown off his game. [He’s Back, He’s Back! CHEAP SHOE GUY! CHEAP SHOE GUY!]
Ladies... 
Batshit Crazy with a ginormous head Stephon Marbury
Fixed.
Love the “CHEAP SHOE GUY” line, btw
If I was a therapist, I would be drooling over this potential client list. (Except for Dwayne Wade. He seems somewhat stable.)
Andie: I don’t think you’ll need to worry about finding a job. You’ll have a law degree from a really good school. (sidenote: Are you going to be doing TAR recaps this season or are you too busy with school and whatnot? /sidenote)
My dad told me the A-Rod news last night and I was all “who cares?” Really, A-Rod is the most uninspiring superstah ever. I just don’t care what he does.
Doug, I was trying to keep up with Survivor and TAR, but between classes, my AR job, job hunting, sports blogging and my Upper Level Writing Requirement (gah), I am not finding a lot of time. I’m lucky if I can watch TV, let alone write about it. Maybe next semester. : )
Wow. That has got to be the single picture in the entire world of A-Snob looking anywhere remotely near “hot”.
Also, this makes him, by default, ugly as hell.