Stand By Your Man – Fantasy QB Results: Week 10

More crunches and less Nestle for you, Mr. Romo.

Now really, how does a quarterback just lose the ball like that? Everything about this picture just confuses me. Was it covered in grease? Cheese fondue? They have that fondue stand at the Pink Taco. Maybe it was chocolate.

Despite the fact that he’s actually played some this season, it completely slipped my mind that Trent Dilfer was still in the league. How old am I? Dilfer was the QB on my 1997 fantasy football team.

Quarterback trivia you can use to win a bar bet: Derek Anderson throws with his right hand, but writes with his left hand.

One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi…

Giant, grown, goofy boy.

Not even sure if they have rainbow trout in the south, but I cannot draw a catfish.

Best part of the 30-yard TD run? The Alan Faneca yelling, “YOU’RE GOOD! GO, GO, GO!” (Would have been cooler if he yelled, “You’re all clear, kid! Now let’s blow this thing and go home.” But I guess it would be hard to think of movie quotes with a 300 pound linebacker in your face looking to squish you.)

Why does Eli look like he’s 12 years old? He was drafted the same year as Ben Roethlisberger and Philip Rivers and yet he looks like he should be starting second-string JV.

Maybe with that disgusted look he can at least find a date to the prom. Assuming he can find the aisle in Duane Reed that stocks Clearasil.

I wouldn’t dare.

And for Holly’s sake, let us not dwell on Peyton’s Week 10 troubles and instead gaze upon on the fine display of military might that is Jeremy Shockey.

Week 10 Results

Texas Gal’s The Real (Colt)McCoy 118.84 Brett Favre 26.14
TheStarterWife 112.02 Ben Roethlisberger 31.02

GordonShumway’s Angelina Ate My Baby 109.98 Drew Brees 16.88
Metschick’s (De)Jesus’ Homies 105.24 Eli Manning 11.74

SA’s Woodson over Manning 105.42 Matt Hasselbeck 19.72
Holly’s JimBobCooterGaveMe6 162.02 Peyton Manning 17.12

Clare’s Speckhosen 104.86 Jon Kitna 13.78
Andrea’s ThreatLevelMidnight 122.08 Tony Romo 24.88

Stand By Your Man Rankings

1. SA
Tom Brady 9-0
Matt Hasselbeck 1-0

2. Texas Gal
Vince Young 2-1
Brett Favre 4-3

3. TheStarterWife
Ben Roethlisberger 5-4
Carson Palmer 0-1

3. Andrea
Marc Bulger 1-2
Tony Romo 4-3

5. GordonShumway
Drew Brees 4-6
Jake Delhomme 0-0

5. Holly
Peyton Manning 3-6
David Carr 0-0
Donovan McNabb 1-0

7. Metschick
Philip Rivers 3-6
Alex Smith 0-0
Eli Manning 0-1

7. Clare
Rex Grossman 0-1
Jon Kitna 3-5
Matt Schaub 0-1

Divisional Team Rankings

Divison 1
2. TheStarterWife 7-3-0 .700 1339.60
3. ThreatLevelMidnight 7-3-0 .700 1459.88
5. Woodson over Manning 5-5-0 .500 1558.36
8. (De)Jesus’ Homies 1-9-0 .100 963.10

Division 2
1. JimBobCooterGaveMe6 7-3-0 .700 1566.96
4. Speckhosen 7-3-0 .700 1361.36
6. The Real (Colt)McCoy 5-5-0 .500 1256.46
7. Angelina Ate My Baby 1-9-0 .100 986.88

Sorry, I don’t think I’ve played with the MS Paint since this post (why is the formatting off on that post, I do not know) and just felt like goofing off last night.  

23 thoughts on “Stand By Your Man – Fantasy QB Results: Week 10

  1. OMFG! Awesome post TSW. I think I may have hurt myself laughing.

    Pam-yes, but I think that was when you had to do all the stats, scoring, etc. manually w/spreadsheets. It was very cumbersome.

  2. Pam – I typed 1997 last night, but the more I think about it, he might have been my QB in 1998. But yes, fantasy football existed then. (I also might have hung out in a once weekly chatroom for the Sporting News “Caught on the Fly” that year.) Old AND dorky.

    SA – I was hoping you’d maybe get one loss with the Hasselbeck since no one is stopping Brady. Dammit.

  3. Wow, I thought fantasy football was a more recent phenomenon…I was a freshman in high school in 1997, and I wasn’t very into pro sports back then.

  4. More importantly that FF or any of that Shockey nonsense, WTF IS THAT THING ON TONY ROMO’S BELLY?! Is that really a “gut”? Because if it is, I applaud you Mr. Romo. I applaud you for being brash enough to have a bit of a “pooch” and look more normal and human that other, chiseled, “cleared” athletes who make us mere mortals feel puny and self-conscience.

    Hooray for beer bellies and saggy man boobs!

  5. Hey, I just realized Metsy’s playing coy. She did set her roster this week, as Philip Rivers played last week.

    *points at Metsy… points back at own head… taps noggin… hears empty noise… gets confused as why Metschick is looking at her strangely… wanders off to get a coffee.*

    Andrea – I’ll tremble at the thought that Romo should look into some Zelacore or Relicore or whatever ad it is which features the scientific wire-frame body with the belly fat melting away.

  6. When did Perez Hilton take over the Land of the Ladies?

    @Yostal: +whatever is handed out in these parts (1 wheel of cheese? 1 piece of bacon?)

    @Holly: Neither your team or mine deserved to win that game. At some point I felt a tie would be most fitting. Either that or natural disaster.

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