Bracket season has come and gone. The draft was ten years ago in internets time. What’s a number-crunching sports fan to do?
Never fear. The Ladies… proudly present: The 2007 Hot Blogger Bracket!
How This Will Work:
1. You have to be a guy. (Sorry, girls; for objectification of the fairer sex we direct you to the majority of our compatriots in the sidebar.)
2. You have to run or contribute substantially to a sports blog. (Exactly what constitutes “substantial” will be determined on a case-by-case basis by the Ladies…, and not open to appeals.)
3. You will submit one (1) recent photo, of you, in focus, that gives a good look at your face and any other assets you wish to emphasize, and one (1) link to a post you feel best represents your superiority as a writer.
4. The Ladies… will spend what’s sure to be a delightful few days judging your sweet asses, and come up with a field, the size of which will be a multiple of four and determined by the quantity and quality of entries.
5. We’ll post our choices in bracket form, and here’s where the real fun begins. Voting for each round will take a couple days. Cheating, shenanigans, and ballot-stuffing are encouraged, especially if they’re undertaken in a blatant and hilarious manner. We remind all entrants that we are susceptible to flattery.
6. Repeat as needed until the champion emerges, to be showered with florid prose (by us) and mocked roundly (by the losers) until next year. Given proper incentive, we may even scare up a couple prizes.
And that’s it. Please direct all submissions to ladiesdotdotdot@gmail.com. You have until 11:59 PM PDT, Friday, May 11.
Go.
*(subject to change without notice at our whim. girls are fickle. affirmed.)
WOO HOO!!! Let’s see those bitchin’ thighs, Will!
I…wow.
WOO HOO!!!
…what?
Is it too early to post: Yes (x64) ?? And I will fully admit that I will be biased towards anyone who is a fan of the same teams I am.
I fully admit I will be biased towards the cutest ones, regardless of teams/blog/talent as a writer. I’m a sucker for a cute face.
You want me to go back in and add the “blatant homerism” tag? We don’t use that one enough.
Holly: I use that tag nearly every time I write a post.
And this is going to be FUN!
I think almost every post I write is homer-ish, Metsy. I think I’m incapable of being neutral.
I can’t wait for the roundtable discussions we’re going to have…
Make sure the geniuses over at GGS know this is for guy bloggers only. Unless, of course, you want your inbox flooded with fake tit shots.
All photos of Captain Caveman must be in his unis.
Or, of course, nude.
How about posed, Playboy “Girls of the Big XII” (or other conference) style, in football pants, or bball jerseys, or baseball pants? Eyeblack gets you bonus points.
MMMMMMEyeblack. Consider my day officially brightened. Bring it on, boys!
Well, at least you’re honest, Andie.
Any boy who plies me with cute photos of Cole/Chutley/Aaron Rowand/Big Baby Jesus gets a No. 1 seed in my bracket (not a euphemism).
I like that idea, Tex. “Guys of the Blogosphere?” With the wind blowing their hair back?
And eyeblack. Don’t forget the eyeblack.
Mussy hair, damp with sweat, also is a good thing.
(we’re practically writing a how-to guide for the boys right now)
Tex, you know you’re basically describing Chutley without his helmet on, right?
You guys know that I’ve been emailing peeps all over the place right? Guys who I think are brillant writers and find them hot even though I have no idea what they look like?
It’s how StarterBoyfriend won me over. I thought he was just ok after our first date, (we had been set up by friends), but then he started sending me the most glorious emails every day and I loved his writing style so much I fell in love.
I should say that my one friend – the most skilled writer of the bunch – responded with, “The only ‘hot anything contest’ I should be involved in at my age is a hot turkey sandwich eating contest.”
Clare- oh, boy, do I ever. Speaking of- fancy some Phillies action tonight?
I suspect I am at a serious disadvantage here, yet I am vain enough to consider sending a photo.
TSW: that’s the best way! That’s how my husband first snared me. I was all “eh, you’re all right.” But then he charmed the pants off me. Literally.
TSW- please tell any and all of them that the writing component is not for show. Right above “eyeblack” on the sexiest attributes list is “wit”.
StN- do it. You know you want to.
Damn you ladies for mentioning eye black – I’ve now spent the better portion of 40 minutes looking up pics of Beltran in eye black.
S2N–I second that. Get in the ring.
And seriously, the writing part matters. I can’t emphasize this enough.
Wit is the hands-down SEXIEST thing on any man.
Girl, like you have to ASK?
I knew i should have listened to my father and written flowery sports prose on my blog, but nooooo….I had to go to college, get a job, get married, have kids.
And by flowery, I mean actually write something.
I could have been somebody.
OK, back to the Texans cheerleaders not getting paid enough post. They look nice.
A guy who can make you laugh is the best thing in the world. Witty banter is a must.
Wit… hot ass in baseball pants… wit…. hot ass in baseball pants. OK, wit wins- by a nose.
Also: Clare- you, me, Chutley, Cole & Pat (and Greg and Wes and Ryan and Shane and Aaron), 9:40 @ DUAN. It’s a date.
The free world is lucky that you’re not doing this by site. WithLeather would steamroll the competition even with Kevin bringing the hotness level down to almost bearable levels.
twoeightnine, do you contribute to With Leather? : )
That I do…
I’m the real brains behind the site, Matt is the eye-candy.
(But which Matt?????)
I thought it was just Matt, Kevin and you…..?
And yes, we all know you’re some kind of puppeteer evil genius guy.
My name is Matt.
I know that, doof. I was acting as though your name is twoeightnine. You get very particular about it, capitalization and such. : )
I’m a real person!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TG, I’m an Astros fan since t-ball days. And I’m verifiably smoking hot.
Too bad I don’t technically qualify as a sports blogger. More of a sports blog lurker if anything. Getting a question in on Simmons’ last chat is probably the closest I’ll ever get to internet noteriety.
Both Matts AND Kevin are cordially invited to participate. C’mon, now.
And you’re right, 289…the unholy triumvirate of hottness that is With Leather would win in a walk, near as I can tell.
Is there any doubt that the final two are Mottram and Ufford??? I mean I may partake just for shits and giggles but maybe I won’t. My writing is subpar. I don’t have any pictures of me in eye black (yet) and I don’t like any of your teams. I don’t think my ego can take a 95% – 5% loss to Mottram in round one.
MDG, all are welcome! You never know what might trip our collective trigger.
That’s also assuming Mottram and Ufford are inclined to participate, to be fair.
Considering we are 8 very different ladies from 8 very different walks of life and who grew up in 8 very different parts of the country… I don’t think there’s any way anyone can handicap who is going to win this race.
For example, if Roger Clemens was in this bracket, I can guaran-damn-tee you I’d be the only one voting for him. (He is HOT, I don’t care what y’all say- everyone else pretty much hates him with the fire of a thousand suns.)
There is no pre-ordained winner. Otherwise there would be no point.
There’s more to take into account than just looks and writing, too… Shanoff’s no slouch in either category, but his boundless enthusiasm for this endeavor since we came up with the idea months ago is winning him major early points.
he he he he he trip your trigger
Will nude pictures give me a higher or lower seed?
Well, just let me know when y’all get a bracket for hot radio play-by-play guys, and I will nominate other people. While I am a radio play-by-play guy, I can’t claim any sort of hotness. I am funny, though.
Will nude pictures give me a higher or lower seed?
They would give all of us a lower seed count.
In my day, when ital tags were left open, everyone felt it. And that’s the way it was and we LIKED IT.
twoeightnine, you can send those my way. I’ll be the judge……
I’ve always felt that giving good… email… was undervalued. It’s nice to see it getting its due here in winning you over. It takes a caring, energetic and attentive… writer… to pull it off — someone who says, “It’s the… readers… needs I’m thinking about most.” And if you’ve never experienced the “QWERTY Swirl,” you’ve been missing out.
Wow, I’m going to have to work really hard on my writing, unless we’re really doing the hot turkey eating. I can beat your friend and Prince Fielder with one mandible tied behind my back in that one.
Or, you could do some of us a favor and start a senior circuit.
I’m with MDG on this one……the brackets will be rigged in favor of the man candy. I just hope one of my diatribes on the impact of announcing on Western Civilazation will knock off one of the juggernauts.
Or, umm Cheerleader asses? Does that work???
The quality of writing and making us laugh is VERY HIGH on the list, AA.
Did you guys not see the picture of TSB’s ass in the post above this one?
Also high on the list: not ripping on Pat Burrell. Extrapolator- you’re out.
I mean, he’s not strictly a blogger, but can we enter in Bill Simmons as a 32-seed?
Dammit Shanoff……stop buttering them up already. Umm, yeah butter ladies….you want me to rub it on you?
Okay I suck at this….
I’ve seen AA, he needs to rely on his writing.
and the pic is already available online.
The picture of you naked?
maybe
I’m waiting……
It’s not a nude photo, but I can provide an action still of me playing in a national curling tournament.
No wait, strike that … it’s both.
Wow, twoeightnine, I would say you’re the leader in the clubhouse.
Action still? I don’t want to see any pictures of the action that you’ve been getting.
I think we need to add a bonus category: voice samples. Submit a reading of your favorite line from Top Gun, Caddyshack or Major League (mp3 format) to show off a deep voice or sexy accent.
C’mon, just put it on facebook…..real quick like…… : )
intergoogles can probably find it for you.
and i don’t know the meaning of quick.
I would submit a voice sample, but there would be no way that Andrea would ever vote for me, based on the clip I would show.
If it’s you calling the Iowa/Northwestern State game, then no. : )
“I think we need to add a bonus category: voice samples.”
Of all the samples you could have requested, you went with the least juvenile.
“and i don’t know the meaning of quick.”
I suppose 30 seconds *can* pass slowly.
Ouch 289…..ouch. The ladies appreciate money though I’m sure, and walking out on your bar tab screams deadbeat to me.
@Texas Gal
Which do you want on the audio clip, the full Texas accent or the neutral but resonant accent that I’ve cultivated for my work?
Thrifty! I call it thrifty!
And I didn’t know that it happened until the next day. Besides everyone knows it really was Mottram. It’s always the pretty one.
Full accent, baby. Southern accents are a killer.
So, the checklist so far is: eyeblack, Southern accent, rapier wit, cute butt… am I missing anything?
great smile
How could I have left that off the list?
While I am a radio play-by-play guy, I can’t claim any sort of hotness. I am funny, though.
Funny = hot. Don’t sell yourself short!
Ladies, I’ll have to seriously consider entering the contest. I’ve liked being faceless on my blog, but who can resist the siren call of the ladies? Just promise me that stalker insurance is provided. Us hot bloggers need protection from the weirdos out there.
Not when we are the weirdos.
Shh!!! Suss, we don’t start spreading the rumors about Mottram and Ufford until the quarterfinals. Follow the script already!
MCBias, I think you should give in to the Ladies’ temptation….
Sorry. I thought I was in this scene.
Exeunt.
Should I throw my hat into the ring? I think my face (and my hair) would make me a darkhorse mid-major pick.
Mottram makes me swoon. And I’m a dude.
Seriously, though – the competition is lucky that DeadOn is about pop culture, and not sports, or I would kick some bootay.
TG – I didn’t rip on Burrell. I’m a faciliatator, not an agitator. Of course, maybe we SHOULD get the brackets done before the Roger Clemens edition of Voodoo Sabermetrics comes out…
In fact, maybe TG has to recuse herself from judging me based on prior knowledge. Which sounds waaaay dirtier than it really is.
Actually, my radio voice usually kicks in about 50% of my appeal (if my wife is to be believed), so maybe I should send in a clip.
The combination of vanity and rank fear the male bloggers are exhibiting is fascinating.
LA, MC – Tell Holly I’m good looking and have a rapist wit.
By the way, I will be VERY DISAPPOINTED if all memebers of AA’s Channel Four News Team aren’t in the contest.
“The combination of vanity and rank fear the male bloggers are exhibiting is fascinating.” Uh-oh, I see who’s winning the writing part of the competition! Funny.
Great arguments, guys. NOW TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRTS!
Ladies, I’ll have to seriously consider entering the contest.
MCB, I’m telling you, you’re on my list. Put on a helmet and pads and get in here.
Tell Holly I’m good looking and have a rapist wit.
Hi, darlin! Fancy seeing you here.
DOES CARL MONDAY HAVE A BLOG??
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For the record:
Number of responding contestants who have referenced the surpassing radiance of Mottram: SIX. Yes, really.
I think McBias should enter with the FIST shot. I love those pictures. Something seems so tough about them.
I had the same conversation with him a few weeks ago ,actually.
Y’hear, MCB?
Every guy apparently has a man-crush on Mottram. It’s kind of cute.
Mottram has been on TV multiple times. I have been in a small-town newspaper once, and they did not include my picture. Advantage: Mottram. There’s plenty of reasons for our healthy respect (and sneaky attempts to throw him under the bus once the competition is underway. :-p)
*There are, I should say. Writing counts in the contest too!
Have you invited Rod Benson?
“I like that idea, Tex. “Guys of the Blogosphere?” With the wind blowing their hair back?”
Lady Andrea-
Did you mean “wind blowing their back hair”? That might open up the field a bit.
Ewwwwwwwwah!
No. Just… no.
We were going to submit a picture of Tim Tebow, but the magic gnomes have concocted a picture whose likeness is close enough for government work.
And that is what happens when you tell someone you look like the love child of Dwight Schrute and Jack Black. Which we do.
Oh my god, that is terrifying. Terrifyingly awesome.
I still think Tebow’s the way to go, for the drama of saying with a perfectly straight face to whoever would be losing to you outright, “Whatever do you mean, that’s Tim Tebow? That, my friend, is your conqueror Orson Swindle. Look it up.”
Not as terrifying as this:
http://awfulannouncing.blogspot.com/2007/05/warning-if-they-mated-is-horrible-game.html
It’s about god damn time I had a chance to be recognized for the sexy beast that I am.
Or the concept that whomever you’re looking at from the University of Florida, you’re really just looking at an avatar of Tim Tebow.
Wait- are you telling me that every guy at UF looks like Tim Tebow? Road trip!
Oh, that’s not what you meant. Dang.
(Let me get this out of the way: Swindle and Peter from Burnt Orange Nation have a considerable leg up on the competition by way of letting me cuss and Texy refuse to cuss on the radio every week. Adjust your lines accordingly.)
The fact that they let us on the radio at all practically makes them gods in my book.
I knew there was a reason I never had a problem with Florida. Now I know.
289, I don’t know what to say about that picture. Speechless.
shit, i want to get in on this, but i don’t want my real identity exposed…though it may have to be…
can i just send a pic of ron jeremy’s junk?
Now what’d we ever do to you, TBP? No one deserves that.
And quit fighting it and join in.
Question is the post we are to submit a previously written, or an essay saying why we are the bees knees of hotness?
I already lose points for an impossible to read sentence, but I think you know what I mean.
I think we’re going for posts you’ve already written.
Wow, this is taking blogwhoring to a whole new level…
What the hell. My terrible MLB picks at NBX.com ain’t exactly bringing in the clicks.
So considering I just started a blog, I’m guessing my entrance (and subsequent trouncing of the rest of the field) is inevitable. Time to go make sure my tan is in full effect (thanks for something, Florida).
any other assets you wish to emphasize
Wow, you ladies are opening yourselves up to a world of hurt …
Okay, so a sense of humor is sexy? Then why are there no pictures of Steven Wright or Ralphie May up here with discussions of their relative hotness?
Blog-ger?
I am starting to think this is just a way to get bloggers to reveal their identities. Sorta like when Bugs Bunny dressed as a woman to seduce Elmer Fudd.
But I’ll be damned if I am not really thinking about it. If CC gets bonus points for a military uni, so should I, right?
Radio- because this blog isn’t about funny comedians, it’s about hot athletes. Now if someone wants to start up a funny comedian blog, I’d like to nominate Gallagher.
But when we’re talking about hot bloggers, it ain’t just the pretty in the face- it’s also the pretty in the wit that counts.
I can’t decide whether to enter or not. I’m thinking yes, just so I can be totally humiliated. It’s nice to have your ego kept in check.
Does overly-frequent Deadspin commenter qualify as “contribute substantially to a sports blog”?
If so, Ladies…
I think Sam Cassell is sort of funny….
Stupid “sports blogs only” stipulation. I work in a baseball/softball store, dammit. I could’ve been wearing nothing but tight baseball pants and eyeblack. Oh well, what could have been…
How can you not enter? For you guys to be ogled by these Ladies… should be an honor. Even if they make fun of you. Better to be made fun of by a beautiful woman than ignored. Everybody knows that. It’s Guy Rule #27. Every one of you guys needs to enter.
Well, at least some of us are happy to reveal our true identities via various events under the moniker “Pants Party”, but I guess it’s a bit different to do so on the ebays for all the world to see.
Of course, I am not a blogger, so I don’t count anyway. Mostly I contribute unfunny, witless statements to Deadspin comment threads. The remainder of my writings are patents, legal briefs and patent opinions, where wit and humor really count.
So, YDD – You’re With Patent Leather?
Funny-looking, yes, Radioman. Not funny ha-ha.
(and I say that as a Houstonian and Rockets fan)
Tattooed Mess, I’m actually sad about that too. I’ve seen your pics on myspace…..
so you have to be 1) hot 2) funny 3) good writer 4) profit?
I’m not even an 8 seed in the MEAC tournament at this this point..
I may throw my hat in. Andrea, hold my wallet. Let’s just say there may or may not be Cards/Cubs tickets for July 24-26. I guess that’s up to you.
Thanks, Andie. I might send in some eye candy anyway. God knows there aren’t enough incriminating photos of me on the web yet.
1. have a good picture (no i smile like an idiot in all photos)
2. be a good writer (no, i guess not)
3. be funny (are we laughing with or at)
4. be profitable (no not really)
so I have no credentials and no reason to be in the tournament, can I be arkansas?
@ TG,
Barkley? Funny guy, weird round head and speech impediment…
Damn, I’ve got the physical attributes locked down…unfortunately my contributions to Blogkind are rather lame. Ladies… any advice?
PS- AKA A-fennel-wreath-and-paper-pants / The Claudine Longet Firearm Training Academy / The Ghost of Luke Ward
Extrapolater, the only leather with me is my belts, shoes, and that one pair of black leather pants in my closet that probably don’t fit me anymore.
If anyone needs me, I’ll be over in the corner curled up in the fetal position, weeping softly. (Just like on prom night!)
Having a blog mention on Deadspin, does that classify one as a sports blogger, even if the blog has been defunct for say…6 months?
Burnsy, you know where my heart lies. I’ll take it.
TattooedMess, we’ll always take gratuitous eyecandy.
And like our Illustrious Leader said, “substantial” will be determined by the Ladies on a case-by-case basis, so you might as well give it a shot.
Has anyone mentioned how pretty you all are lately?
I can only imagine the street cred that will come from being named the hottest blogger. Street & Smiths will be banging down my door.
I think you get your own hour on ESPNU.
Burnsy, I checked out your blog. I love the picture of you with the giant St.L ball. Very cute.
If a Hot Blogger gets an hour on ESPNU, but no one is there to see it, did it really happen?
Cute doesn’t cut it. I’ll have to dig up my picture of me laying on a Fredbird skin rug.
Fredbird skin rug just made me snort with laughter. And also: ewwwwww.
Yeah, sorry Burnsy. Texas is all about homer teams.
I’m not sure if I could give points to a Cubs fan or not…..he’d have to be pretty cute…..
Hmmmm… could we be in here? Yes, but only here. It’s like competing with the faces of radio, except it’s all new-agey…
Blogger? I barely know her. Bah-dum-bum.
This is a fantastic idea…..where do I submit my photo/mugshot?
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This is like TBP’s “Would You Do” Tournament….only the complete opposite
Touche.
This is like TBP’s “Would You Do” Tournament… only the complete opposite
Apparently, they decided having Chris Berman wasn’t going to work, so they called on us clowns.
Questionable looks, questionable writing skill. I figure I’m at least play-in game material. I hear Dayton is lovely this time of year.
Besides, somebody has to represent the Yinzer Mafia. (Translation: I’m leaning on TSW as much as the STL fans are leaning on Andrea.)
If I remember correctly (and the bourbon may have warped my memory)- this whole hot blogger thingie was conceived as a way to cleanse the Ladies… collective palettes after one of us instigated a lengthy discussion on sexing Chris Berman.
Tex, the Brewers rocking our collective worlds is so depressing.
Marco, submissions can be sent to ladiesdotdotdot@gmail.com
All members of the Yinzer Mafia can count on me. We all know the Three Rivers is thicker than blood.
Where do we send our karaoke renditions of 80s monster ballads?
Ok, so the winner gets his picture in the banner at the top of your page, right?
Are we allowed to submit entries as a posse if our blogs have a couple contributors?
All members of the Yinzer Mafia can count on me. We all know the Three Rivers is thicker than blood.
They can count on me too, since Dan and Enrico are being — to use Grandpa Jamie’s word — wimps about the bracket. (You hear that? I’m calling you out!)
Rupert, I think you should be able to combine all of your contributors’ best qualities Photshop-style to make an uber-hottie for your blog. The opposite of the Olbermann-Lobo lovechild.
Where do we send our karaoke renditions of 80s monster ballads?
Straight to my pants, baby.
Rupert, you cannot submit as a site. We have previously discussed how With Leather would pretty much mop the floor with y’all. But you each can feel free to submit.
I for disagree with “mop the floor”, but then again, I’ve never seen 289.
Plus, he’s a Saber fan.
I meant besides there, Clare.
Damn, we do a mean Voltron too.
I just appreciated the fact that Voltron had a fat guy in one of the Lions. Made me feel like a superhero.
It’s true, I love fencing!
wouldn;t the opposite of a olberman lobo love child be a nba player and ann coulter love child, assuming ann coulter was capable of love.
Go Voltron!
LA: The Brewers rocking our teams sucks, yes- but JJ Hardy can rock my world anytime. Geoff Jenkins, too.
Oh, I have nothing against the Brewers’ players. There are some cuties up there. “The Good Land,” indeed.
Burnsy just got negative points from me. Sorry, darlin’ – Cubs fan rules require it.
And beer. For all that is good and holy, do not forget about the beer.
I hope you’re not calling me a Cubs fan. I can take a negative point for being a Cards fan. I’ll just put it next to our World Series trophy.
Please tell me we get to contribute profiles with age, favorite teams, and all that sort of stuff on it.
Hmmm, I’m wondering what rules me out more: That my blog is not exclusively about sports or the fact that I haven’t written regularly for it in months and months. It’s quite the question.
Or the fact that no one really cares what I said about anything, haha.
Dear Burnsy, I’m calling myself an Cubs fan. Andie can translate my post to Card-speak if need be. And right now, the Brewers are rockin’ all our worlds, so at least we share that.
Profiles might be a good idea. Little tidbits about yourself. Warning in advance: saying anything negative about the Texas Longhorns will get you torpedoed. I’m not even kidding about this.
does previous spamming get you torpedoed?
I don’t mind somebody liking a team I happen to dislike, but negativity about any of our homer teams will be frowned upon.
Dr. Doom, I would direct your question to Queen of the Ladies…, Holly.
Andrea – Which means all of CC’s Seahawk love could kill him. (While Ape rises in the power listing.)
Yeah, if you all had a template the contestants had to fill out. Sort of like a tournament resume. And you can get Lunardi to evaulate everything; he’s not busy anyways.
Yyyyyeah, I’m gonna go with “no”.
Heh heh.
If AA’s Channel 4 News Team gets involved in this, the world may never be the same.
And not in a good way.
Whoever gets Monday to join of his own free will gets an automatic one-seed.
does that include me Holly?
guesing the response is no.
I may have to get in on this.
You might be surprised at how many teeth I actually do have.
I’m definitely concerned my team affiliations could hurt me here — even if I didn’t grow up in Boston, still pronounce all of my “r’s” and can’t STAND ben affleck at red sox games.
Torpedoed? Is that anything like the Smokey Tornado?
I know G-Money and SA have a severe dislike for my Alma Mater (UNC). I think the fact that more than one of the Ladies…hate a team for which I have undying loyalty is going to hurt me.
I’m just glad I haven’t told you about the time my mom (who has been a Longhorn) was at the Lone Star Showdown in 1981 at College Station wearing a giant hat that said “I’m an Aggie and I’m Proud of It.”
Uh-oh.
twoeightnine, it’s the Ladies’ version of the Smokey Tornado.
Mike White, thank god there really aren’t any Iowa State fans around, well, anywhere…..
Okay, I have two defenses for that last statement:
1. My mom is from Spain, and at the time was attending her very first American football game. (I should mention that as far as hotness is concerned, having Spanish blood is a huge plus.)
2. Apparently, the Texas A&M student who sold the hat to her was, to this day, one of the hottest guys she has ever seen.
I heard the annoying spam slinging jackhole bracket is coming up in June. Start doing your crunches, Dr Doom!
All of the Channel 4 News Team needs to be involved in this…..and as the Sex Panther, I think that I get a nice head start on the competition…
Andrea, can I just assume that based on my audio clip and my team affiliation that I am immediately eliminated on your judging ballot? I do like Amazing Race, though, so maybe that helps.
I’m not sure what your audio clip or your team affiliations actually are.
When are the WordPress gerbils eligible for free-agency? I ask, ’cause I think that Denton needs to pony up for ’em… I am surprised this nigh 200 comments post didn’t break WordPress, but since it didn’t, that speaks well to the engines of the blogonomy. Here, at least.
(I should mention that as far as hotness is concerned, having Spanish blood is a huge plus.)
So you’re saying your mom is hot.
Mike, you might wanna sit the next few plays out…
When she was “available”, she was smoking hot. AND she was a physician. She had the triple-whammy of being hot, smart, and exotic.
Should I book a flight to Dayton for the play-in game?
hey my apologies to the person who just IM’d me to say they liked the blog. I accidently clicked the close button. Sorry.
Mike,
Freud called. He wants you to call him back, something about his friend Oedipus.
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So she’s “no longer” “available?”
DIBS!
where will this be held jebus?
as if anyone could compete with me.
That’s just wrong, OMDQ.
i imagine i would be a dark horse
is it wrong that I sent in pictures of 289 as my entry?
We can never have too many 289 pics.
dr doom – if you’re sorry for spamming, cool. But apologizing for it doesn’t give you the right to try and inflict yourself on the ladies…
Glad you’re sorry but just stop trying to weasel your way into the bracket.
It’s worse than spamming.
Tex, I figured out how I can get my point back. Not only will I convince my alma mater to let your Horns win on Sept. 15 (tongue-in-cheek, obviously) but I’ll let you hold my wallet, too. There may or may not be two tickets to that game for you in it. That’s your choice.
Bribery with tickets is a great tactic, Burnsy.
Andrea do I get bonus points for being from Iowa? Also, is 18 too young to enter this contest? I have bountiful amounts of eye-black if that matters…
We do not discriminate due to age and being from Iowa is a plus with me. Not so much with any of the other Ladies, I’m afraid.
The only lady that matters in my heart is ladyandrea. Duh.
Oh dear. How old are you again? I’m all a-twitter….
If there is one thing I’m good at its making ladies a-twitter.
Why is your link just to facebook? I was hoping to find your blog.
I apologize for my virgin-blogish antics I just linked there because I don’t currently have a blog. I’m a dedicated reader of KSK, Deadspin, and Withleather, and if I was going to enter the contests I was planning on passing along one of my independent writing ventures.
Ohhhhhh. See, unfortunately one of the rules is that you substantially contribute to a sports blog.
We’d still love a pic and a writing sample, though. : )
Well there goes my hopes and dreams… I thought because of the lack of age you would waive the blog contribution rule. I’ll never be as good as Captain Caveman :(
Ladies…
I have no problem with you asking for our pictures for some “late-night” material, but don’t you also want to get to know about our charming personalities?
Hence the writing sample, Darren.
Lady Andrea, answerer of all questions:
Do my Deadspin/DeadOn contributions plus my sparsely updated personal blog allow me to participate?
I am not the final authority on that. But the rules say substantial contribution to a sports blog. Being a Deadspin commenter does not count and DeadOn is not a sports blog. So, I don’t know SVP.
Well, I’ll ask around but either way thanks for answering. I hope I can participate in your bracket haha.
Andrea, you know my audio clip and my team affiliation. You were right earlier, some 100 posts ago.
well, 300+ pounds has to put me at what, a 12 seed?
Oh my good lord in heaven, I was JOKING about that! I….I…..I might cry myself to sleep…..
Don’t do that! Crying women are like Kryptonite. See, now I just want to hand over my credit cards and let you buy stuff.
MARCO – I demand the picture of you holding Agent Zero’s shoe. That one cracks me up. Then again, that might not be what we’re shooting for here.
I was going to submit a photo of me petting a puppy and helping an old lady across the street to really go for the “guy next door” vote. I really think that’s my strength in this competition.
Radioman, you should’ve seen me after the game in question. Body-wracking sobs.
You know, Andrea, the crazy thing about it is that I was getting pretty emotional about it as well. I almost cracked on the air a couple of times on the post-game show. It was definitely a little dusty in the Palace.
Well, for entirely different reasons. Did you actually go to NWSt?
No, they just sign my paycheck.
Huh. Interesting.
I may not be able to listen to all of it. I’ll give it a go, give your voice its due, but I may have to shut it off before I start crying again. Seriously.
I would not do that to you. If I send anything in, it will be something completely different. With the face for radio, at least I have a voice for radio as well.
Awwww, thanks. And I’m sure you don’t have a face for radio. We’ll be the judge of that.
Anyone know where I can hire a goat?
I heard they go down well in photo shoots…
ok, so i’m totally debating what picture i submit here (and sort of which written sample).
do i go with the genuine smile? a goofy picture? muscle shirt? full frontal?
ladies… suggestions please.
Sanchez: no goat. Unless it’s a kid.
TBP: genuine smile is good. Goofy pics are fun. Muscle shirt – yes, please.
you purposely avoided the full frontal thing didn’t ya, metschick??!?!?
I know I’m losing points right off the bat with TG for being a USC backer.
If all the other members of AA’s Channel 4 News Team are apparently even considering participating, I’d better run through the photo archive.
I’d better hope I’ve got this “wit” thing worked out.
thank you jebus. I will stop attempting to weasel my way in, after all weaseling is what seperates us from all the other animals. except weasels.
I’m debating over which article I should send as my best work for this competition. You Ladies… have seen most of my recent stuff, but one of my favorite articles was actually my very first relating to sports. I wrote it back in October after John Bunting got fired. Let me know if you think it’s good enough for the competition, or you like one of my other articles better.
http://tarheelmania.wordpress.com/2006/10/29/why-the-unc-football-team-should-hire-michael-jordan-updated/
As for the picture, I’m thinking of sending both a genuine smile and a straight face, moving one eyebrow (like The Rock).
Wow that string rolled right on through the night. LDDD is blowing up.
That and vanity is no whisper.
“i imagine i would be a dark horse”
There’s a penis size joke in there somewhere…
No goat?
Damn, that was my money shot…
After a quick run through of the entries so far, I can only say that all you guys are beyond brilliant. Even the USC fans.
Tex – And not to mention, VERY HOT! Holy crap.
Why people complain about Ufford ruining the competition when the vast majority of all the pics we’ve received have been way hotter than he is, I just don’t understand.
The Lady… does not lie. Y’all have been selling yourselves WAY short.
I heartily agree.
Now, if only I could find out which ones were the single ones…
Agreed. The three hottest guys so far don’t even write for a major site.
I had my doubts, but now you Ladies… have me eagerly anticipating these brackets.
Holly’s right, we’ve been getting smaller blog entries and they are CUTE!
So I was debating what photo I could enter, and it seems the best one actually has me in a suit from a recent wedding.
Good idea, or too formal/Duke-like? I fear these things, as a public university grad and all…
Do fantasy hoops blogs count? :)
At first I was dismayed that you limited it to sports blogs rather than, say, oh I don’t know, all blogs. But then your clear capacity as a fan of The Outfield (band, not field position) made me feel much better.
how about muscle shirts where the shirt wearee is holding a cool baby pug dog? i got one of those somewhere…
glad my site linked to that quote?…
Is it a problem the only pictures I have are from my parents basement?
I doubt anyone can compete with the metrosexual ambiguity of Ufford.
But NOISb may have to enter one of our tolken contributors.
So creating a sports blog just to enter this doesn’t work?
Oh, and on the writing; witty, short posts or long, thoughtful posts? I can’t decide myself.
However you want to present yourself, MCB. I like your funny stuff, but that’s just me.
I have never seen so many men so atwitter. I’m just going to be over here in the corner, brooding in a magnificently sexy way.
Heck Extrapolater, I am not a blogger and not hot but I am all a-twitter myself. If only I could pull off magnificently sexy brooding…
Does a ‘Running Blog’ count as a Sports Blog? And is it still a blog if no one reads it? I’m thinking about this, but I’m not sure that my ego could withstand the possible bashing I could take.
Radioman, that’s the beauty of the internet – you just pretend you’re doing it and it’s done. Now they’re all thinking it, even though my brooding is just mean and sullen in real life.
*slaps my money down on the table* I’m in.
I think Shumway would have our heads if running didn’t count as a sport.
One final question-can we send multiple photos and/or articles and let you Ladies… choose your favorite to use for the competition?
i will send hundreds of pictures…
You decide who you are. We decide if we like that. (You hear me, boys who have sent in seventeen blurry pictures? )
I am debating between a few here. Do you prefer a) a nice gay one on a bike ride, b) passed out with a magic marker penis on my face, 3) flying upside on a trapeze, or d) or the circa 1999 phish tour look.
3, for rills.
I feel oddly screwed because there was no response to my email by any of the Ladies. Yep…..I’m done. This is now my official photo…..
Don’t worry AA, your ultimate revenge is that you have been on TV in front of tens and tens of people.
I hope the writing part of the contest can’t be won on the strength of comments on this site alone, else extrapolater has won. That’s what I get for being distracted while preparing my bribes for the ladies… :-p
Lol, that pic is awesome AA.
And you’re hot too, I would totally date you.
I would, too, Sanchez- because he’s David Wright. A dorky David, to be sure– but he’s still cute, even when acting the fool.
For the record–there’s no way in hell we can respond to EVERYONE. Yes, there are that many entries. We got your entry, though, AA. And may I say: Rrrrrrrowr.
Seriously, I have to stop looking at all the entries while at work lest someone notices I’ve been working on the same TPS report for about three days now.
Just tell them you’re working on a TSW report right now, and you’ll get to the TPS later.
I have this bad feeling that there will be mass firings in the wake of this comment thread.
God help me, I’m actually in this contest.
RUTS, God help us all, for so meekly submitting to the Ladies… request for pics. I try to excuse it off as a promotion-related expense for my site, I try to say that this will make me more well known…but frankly I’ve just put a picture of my face in the hands of ladies with proven skill at video-making and photoshop. God help us all, indeed.
TG -lol, omg that’s so true!
Well, I submitted an entry, but I decided against using the picture of me posing at Fenway with my Patriots shirt on, because that just screams “pizza-throwing-masshole!”
As someone heading to Fenway in less than 24 hours for the weekend series, let me be the first (and only?) to say that “pizza-throwing-massholes” can be hot, too.
TG – No doubt about it! But if it was obvious that someone was a Pats fan (hypothetically speaking, of course) I’m sure that person would pick up a lot of negative votes, and I certainly don’t need to handicap myself. Have fun at the game BTW.
gameS, baby- I’m hitting all 3 this weekend. Why do it once, when three times is so much better?
A word of advice, Texas Gal- if you make a reference to Johnny Damon in Fenway Park, you must address him as “Captain Vagina.” A heckling fan behind me in the right field Budweiser section used it in 2005 (when Captain V. was still playing for Boston, no less), and now that he’s shaved his beard and plays for the Yankees, the nickname is even more appropriate.
So I think it’s officially time to make the follow-up post giving us numbers and names.
Ooooh great idea! You need to have a selection show, and we can all bitch about our seeds. Holly can be Billy Packer and I’ll bitch at her how I’m George Mason and deserve a 12 seed.
I volunteer to be Clark Kellogg, providing mediocre analysis and refusing to stare directly into the camera.
AA – Dude, did you just “ooh great idea” your own idea?
Ha…yeah I did. I actually thought of it while typing and go waaaaay too excited. I’m done blowing my load now.
Further, I suggest putting remote cameras in all of the entrants’ parents’ basements, to capture the bloggers’ reactions as they’re either not included in the field of 256, or are paired up against Will Leitch in the first round.
In fact, when I won my conference tournament (really, it’s just the guys on my block — I beat a mostly-toothless crackhead in the finals), I immediately started chanting “We Want Leitch! We want Leitch!” You know, Royal We and all that.
Pats fans, tread lightly. I am warning you now. For details, feel free to click my name and type in, oh, anything related to NE in the search field you’ll find. Go ‘head. You cannot fathom the level of hatred you are dealing with from this girl.
Holly can be Billy Packer
HOW DARE YOU, SIR.
I would never “call” you Billy Packer….it’s role playing. You like role playing don’t you?
BILLY. PACKER???
So AA likes for his women to pretend to be bald, bloviating, asshattish curmudgeons. Holly, indulge the man his one fantasy! C’mon!
So far, all of the NE fans have been apologists, so I’m ok with that.
You don’t even want to know about AA’s Gilbert Gottfried fetish.
Hats of to you, Ladies! It seems the boys have jumped on the wagon enthusiastically.
Oh, and if you can send the single Yankees fans my way, I’d appreciate it.
Actually the fantasy would be a sideline reporter interviewing me at the half and then following me into the locker room….
I should write porn instead of blogging.
A selection show would be awesome, I want to be Seth Davis.
Wait no…..I want to do Seth Davis. My mistake.
AA, would this be the sideline reporter you would like to follow you into the locker room?
http://www.grabow.biz/Speakers/JackArute.htm
You write the porn, we mock the porn.
All right, Andrea calls Seth Davis. Who is going to take Greg Gumbel? Anyone?
Quick recap: I am a fat, unattractive Patriots fan from New Hampshire who often fails in his attempts at humor and sometimes proves unable to string together more than two consecutive sentences in a sensical fashion.
Gee, should I enter or not?
@One More Dying Quail: I love your site. Get in there.
Radioman- Only if he cuddles…..
I think if any chick, er woman said that she liked my site she could have/do whatever she wanted.
God men are easy.
I have been trying not to laugh too loud, because I find it impossible to explain this entire concept to my wife. But RUTS got me with this one:
“Further, I suggest putting remote cameras in all of the entrants’ parents’ basements, to capture the bloggers’ reactions as they’re either not included in the field of 256, or are paired up against Will Leitch in the first round.”
OMDQ – I’m assuming you can’t string sentences together in person, because you’re one of my main go-to guys for analysis (because I mostly just do the point-and-wonder maneuver – how did I get to be a sports blogger again?)
So far, all of the NE fans have been apologists, so I’m ok with that.
Oh, I’m quite aware of the anti-NE feelings in the blogosphere. So, begging for forgiveness seemed to be necessary as a part of entering.
It’s sort of like dropping an SBD in an elevator. All you can do is own it, apologize and move on…
My bust, definitely didn’t close my itals there.
AA – Holly said she loves my site. As a result, I’m probably going to send her an embarassing picture of myself (current pictures only, right? Because honestly, I peaked at the age of three) in the near future.
Yes, men ARE easy.
Extra – I generally don’t even speak in real life. Grunting and pointing is usually sufficient.
OK, I gave in and sent the best photo I could find. I’m ready to have my ego destroyed.
AA – yeah, no kidding.
Same here, S2N. I would be happy just to keep my dignity after this.
Bloggers with dignity. Now I’ve heard everything.
Bloody Hell! I totally forgot to mention that I have an English accent when I submitted my entry.
S2N, you know I got nothin’ but love for you. Who else holds me through the internets during the scary parts of Planet Earth?
Ever since I clicked the send button, my paranoia level is through the roof.
Holly, it’s not you nor the rest of the Ladies… I necessarily fear. It’s that whole scary world out there….
Man, I didn’t even think of the ramifications…. this could tear the News Team apart.
Bros before hoes, fellas. I mean, Bros before Ladies…
All right, I’m in. May God have mercy on my soul…’cause I have a feeling nobody else will.
OK, a few more like this and we can have the hot dads bracket. OMDQ is close enough to fatherhood to count.
Don’t worry too much, Mr. Busbee. I’ve seen a picture of you and only cowered away in horror for a few seconds. That should be good enough for at least the Round of 32.
Look, there’s no other way to say this, so I’ll just lay it out: A majority of you are very, very good-looking. Seriously. No, I know! We’re surprised too.
(Call us.)
Can you give any indication of how many entries you’ve received and how many will make the cut? I don’t mind being the in the ‘play-in’ game.
Agreed. We need a Selection Sunday.
I submitted and submitted. Good luck to all of the fellas. Ladies, my back rub sessions start in 10 minutes…See you soon.
If we’re left out can we have a NIT?
Oh, god, the sports bloggers who weren’t hot enough NIT. I can’t wait to see the banner for that one.
I suspect The Ladies… are having about as much difficulty narrowing down the hot bloggers bracket as we at AA are having with the Douchebag Scale. Some difficult decisions to be made and some worthy entrants to be left out in either case. But at least if you get left out of the hot blogger bracket, you still have time to make your case to be in the Dbag list.
Wait a minute…all this time no one has told me that there are douchebags on the Internet? What other lies have I been told?
Submitted at 11:15 PDT.. nothing like the last minute entry to get them fired up
How many entries did we get?
In my day to day life, I would say a “butt-load” of entries.
Would you say you have a ‘plethora’ of entries?
Damn. We should have all dressed in Mariachi outfits to confuse El Guapo.
It doesn’t come across very well on the internets but I’m doing the 3 Amigos salute right now. Huhh!
So is tomorrow Selection Monday? When can we expect the release of the bracket?
^ Same as Mike White above. I mean, really, the 12 dozen roses that I ordered are wilting*, and the gift certificates for Neiman Marcus are only good until 6/30/07*. Hurry up already. :-p
*Restrictions, such as me winning this contest, may apply.
I’d like to nominate the two dudes from blog show and that guy at comcast who helps them out on the show. mottram, steinberg, and little. I think there is a picture of the three of them in the following post on the producer guys new blog.
http://dudeabides.blogspot.com/2007/05/blog-show-returns.html
I think Mottram has already entered, and he would do well in this contest. As for Steinberg? Sorry, not enough hair.
The committee met last night – expect an update from Holly soon.
You guys do NOT make this easy. So many talented writers, and so many cuties it is a bit overwhelming. Quite frankly, I feel like a bit of a fraud after going through all those posts.
It just seems somehow wrong that we’re all so excited about this…
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Hey Ladies… sorry about the random “comment” linking to one of my posts, if indeed it’s something to apologize about. I’m very new at this WordPress thing and I meant no harm or threadjack.
On a random note, I imagine nearly every conversation you Ladies… have to be kinda like the song “Shoop” by Salt n Pepa or at least make a few direct references each day.
Don’t worry, JP – wordpress does a linkback any time you link within the community. I don’t think you can control it aside from not writing a link. It lets the blog author know you are talking about them, which everyone likes.
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i guess i’ll wait til next year…
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Karel z – nabyek
The best picture you will put is having your best asset your abs. the six packs, it is the time you can show that you have a sexy body.:)
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