Sportswriters spilled gallons of ink during the off season about today’s Homer Hottie, Philadelphia Phillies first baseman Ryan Howard.
By now you know all the highlights: In little league, hit a homer over a Red Lobster in the outfield, won last year’s All-Star Game Home Run Derby, led the entire major league with 58 homers last season, only the second player after Cal Ripken Jr. (no slouch himself in the hotness department, in a silver fox kind of way) to win Rookie of the Year and Most Valuable player in consecutive seasons. So let’s just get right to the hotness, yeah?
The big man at the plate, putting fear into hearts of pitchers everywhere.
Ry Ho’s little boy is a clone of his pop, is he not?
Wait…wrong Ryan Howard.
He gives his teammates a helping hand when they overextend themselves. So helpful!
The phrase “bull in a china shop” sometimes comes to mind, though.
Look at that punim!