Hit and Run- Opening Day

Opening Day means it’s all baseball, all the time around here- at least for 24 hours. Let’s check in on a few of our (OK, my) favorite baseball hotties…

* Our favorite pretty prancing princess partyboy Pat Burrell got a lot of attention over the weekend for his attempt at keeping up foreign relations, Maverick & Goose style. Maybe he cashed in that “Get Out of Trouble Free” card he earned from popping a 2-run homer against newly sainted Red Sock Dice-K. [Watch Pat the Bat go yard on Dice-K] (courtesy Balls Sticks & Stuff) But flipping off the team’s manager is not likely to get him a spot on the Sox roster via trade anytime soon- even if it means Boston would get to unload Schilling in the process. [Keep dreaming about that Burrell-Schilling trade, kids]

Pat enjoys swinging his bat, even in the (triple A) locker room

* No pressure, lovely Texan hottie Scott Podsednik– it’s just that the success of the entire White Sox season depends solely on you, apparently. [Ozzie says you don’t get on base, but you can always get on base with me] Let’s try and get back to the Scotty Po-Po of 2005, as opposed to the Scotty No-No of 2006 — you’ve even got that blue seat marking your homer in the outfield of the Cell to remind you. [If you hadn’t homered off my Astros, and ruined Brad Lidge in the process, I’d celebrate that memory a lot more]

* Alex Rodriguez to the Cubs? Really? Somehow I don’t think Cezar Izturis is going to be keen on being A-Rod’s new BFF/Jeter. [Unsubstantiated rumors are fun!]

* Welcome back to the land of the living, Joe Mauer. Sure, you came back from a weeklong injury absence and stepped up with a game-tying double (3 RBI)- but doing it with your “Big Stick” gets you bonus style points. No woman can resist a Big Stick, especially one wielded by a hottie in a baseball uniform. [Walk softly and carry Joe’s bat]

Truth in advertising

* Sometimes the best thing to cure a broken heart is a rebound relationship. The Oakland A’s are playing rebound girl for Todd Walker, and signed him to a minor league contract just four days after he was unceremoniously dumped by the Padres. With Dan “Miami Vice” Johnson on the DL, and Nick “Watch Me” Swisher likely to be needed in the OF to cover for Kotsay, the 33 year-old hot-Toddie is lookin’ mighty fine indeed to the A’s for the 1B slot. I’m just looking forward to seeing him in Athletics green- which should be even more flattering than Padres blue. [Oakland acquires Todd Walker, makes a serious run at “hottest team in baseball” title]

* And how about a sweet note to wrap things up? Nomar Garciaparra was back at Dodger Stadium and working on Friday after his (kickass) wife Mia Hamm had twin girls Grace and Ava Garciaparra last Tuesday, 5 weeks ahead of schedule. [What boy could ever possibly be cool enough to date a daughter of Nomaaahhh and Mia Hamm?]