Dearest Ohio State Patron Saint Jesse Owens,
Today, we ask you for your speed, for your stamina, and for your strength. We ask that your hope and your determination become a beacon of light to guide us on this day, the day we face our greatest challenge yet. We ask for your patience and that your heart become our center in case we do not make it through and lose our bet with the KissingSuzyKolber Mafia.
Because like you, OSU Saint Owens, we too are outsiders. We too have not been welcomed. We too have been told we just do not belong.
When you raced in the Berlin Olympics the whole world watched as you reached for the sun, refusing to let the light go dim despite the hostile environment in which you made your mark.
Upon return to the United States, you were not treated like royalty, OSU Saint Owens. Society still looked at you sideways and refused you entry to their most sacred circles. They turned your career into a freak show, racing animals and giving you jobs that were little more than titles and a meager paycheck.
But they could not take away your sun.
We have been told that as Ladies we are nothing but a distraction. That we do not truly understand what it is to be a fan. That there is no room for us in sports. And like you, OSU Saint Owens, all we want to do is make the world a little bit better for our kind — the female sports fan.
We don’t expect cool guys to like us or even add us to their blog rolls.
We just hope to do our best and get our shot at the sun.
So we thank you Ohio State Patron Saint Jesse Owens on today, the day of our biggest challenge. Thank you for listening. Please do everything you can to help Greg Oden and Mike Conley win this game for us. Please let OSU win so we do not lose.