While everyone else is busy figuring out what the Matt Schaub to Texans trade means for the Texans, for Schaub, for Michael Vick, for David Carr, for Brady Quinn and for humanity, I’m concerned about something much more important: what does this do to the balance of hotness in Texas?
Come on, now- this is not really a fair trade.
I am not a Texans fan, so I don’t have any pesky real-world issues to deal with here- just the hot boys, and I don’t like my hometown Houston to be deficient. Yao Ming and Lance Berkman are certainly not bringing the pretty to the table- and we have come to rely on the hotness of David Carr. We like to drape him in Texas flags and little else (except those tight football pants) and put him on the cover of magazines.
Our unofficial state motto is: “We worship QBs here, and if you’re not smokin’ hot, you better win a championship.” (see: Romo, Tony for the former, and Aikman, Troy and Young, Vince for the latter). In a vacuum, Matt Schaub would be a perfectly acceptable and cute guy. But next to the Carr heat? He’s just not enough. Let’s just hope the Texans use what few remaining draft picks they have to beef up the roster- and I do mean “beef up”.