Big West Conference Panty Raid: Screwy Bracket, Screwy Names

The Big West Conference tournament is totally weird. The conference has 8 schools, which is the perfect number for a tournament, right? 8-4-2-Champion! But the Big West has decided to be all “different” and “edgy” and “West Coast.” On day one, they have the #8 seed play the #5 seed and the #7 seed play the #6 seed. On day two, the #3 seed plays the lowest remaining seed and the #4 seed plays the highest remaining seed. On day three, the #1 seed plays the lowest remaining seed and the #2 seed plays the highest remaining seed. Then on Sunday the two remaining teams enter Thunderdome armed only with squirt guns and kumquats. It’s so bizarre. Here’s a link to the bracket, if you’d like to check it out for yourself. For more panty-raidy goodness, follow me…

Also weird about this conference? The names of some of the players. All of the teams had at least one off-the-rails name, except UC Riverside (home of Archie, Jug Head, and Nancy Drew). Long Beach St. has a Simon & Garfunkle fan in Tim Island and CS-Fullerton’s prerogative is a player named Bobby Brown. Cal Poly has two guys named Chaz and Titus, but alas the latter’s surname is not Andronicus. UC-Santa Barbara is fielding the lost Gibb brother, Beau. CS-Northridge has a player named Austen Powers and they have the best drag-queen-without-her-wig player I’ve seen yet in Evan Scott. Finally, UC-Irvine and Pacific BOTH have a player named Wolfgang. Wolfgang! What the hell are they putting in the water in California?


Did you actually want to know about the tournament? Well, Long Beach State is 12-2, with the 3 teams behind them at 9-5. Everyone else is sub-.500. I’m gonna go out on a limb and pick the Long Beach Fightin’ 49ers. And here is your All-Conference Hottie Team for the Big West Conference:

Marcus Crenshaw, G, CSU F, 5’10, 170







Chad McDaniel, G, UCI, 6’0, 175







Chris Devine, F, UCSB, 6’8, 230







Glenn Turner, F, UCSB, 6’9, 220







Sean Anderson, C, UC Riverside, 6’10, 230

4 thoughts on “Big West Conference Panty Raid: Screwy Bracket, Screwy Names

  1. We here in Cal Poly country not only get a Chaz and Titus, we’ve got a Dawin (it’s like pronouncing Darwin without the “r”) and a Dreshawn.

    I don’t expect Poly to beat Long Beach and make the tourney, but if they do, shit is going to go crazy here.

  2. I agree, Clare. I am also mesmerized by Sean Anderson’s blue eyes. If he let his hair grow a little, rowr.

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