Homer Hotties: Texas Independence Day Edition

¡Feliz Día de Independencia de Tejas! For those unlucky souls in the other 49 states (and beyond), March 2nd is the official state holiday celebrating the Republic of Texas’ independence- not from Britain (we were still speaking Spanish and/or French at the time), not from the evil Yankee North (that will come later), but from Mexico. Yes, Texas was its own nation for almost 10 years- and we still act like we are today. This was the fourth flag of six to fly over Texas (hence the Six Flags themepark chain name), and we fly all six flags over the capitol building, at sports stadiums, etc. We are a funny people.

Pssst – the answer: Texas (of course)

I am using this day and the history lesson above as my excuse for a special edition of Homer Hotties- because rather than pick one guy, I’m going to give you a rundown of ALL the hotties that play for the Texas Longhorns. Don’t mess with Texas, y’all.

First up, football – which must always receive primary attention and placement, per state law. Out of the 100 guys on the ’06-’07 roster, all but seven are native Texans… so they’re double-packed with Texas goodness. It was very difficult to narrow this down, but here are some hottie highlights (click on the pictures for full-size versions):

Ben Alexander, DT
bonus points: his dogs are named “Bevo” and “Hook ‘Em”
Ryan Bailey, P/PK
bonus points: he can cook, and he loves Super Mario Kart
Marcus Griffin, S
bonus points: he’s on the honor roll and Academic All-Big 12
Colt McCoy, QB
bonus points: he is freakin’ COLT MCCOY, and has the best name ever
Brian Robison, DE
bonus points: also is all-Big XII in track (discus and shotput)

On to baseball, which may have even more hotties per capita than football. College baseball may not be big up north, but in the South, it is big-time stuff- and when you’ve got 6 national championships, the stakes are higher.

yes, please, waiter- I’ll have some Huston

It will be hard for the team to top ultra-hottie Huston Street (and his dad James, and his brothers Jordon and Juston- I’ll do a full post on the Street family later)… but let’s see what we can do:

Drew Bishop, RHP – 6’0″, 188, So.
bonus points: honor roll student, and his dad played football for the Longhorns
Randy Boone, RHP – 6’3″, 210, Sr.
bonus points: avid golfer and accomplished pianist
Tyler Newton, C – 5’10”, 195, Jr.
bonus points: engineering major and pre-med
Andy Reese, RHP – 6’1″, 190, So.
bonus points: honor roll student that does a lot of community service, uncle won a NC for Texas in golf
Kyle Walker, LHP – 6’1″, 195, So.
bonus points: sister played basketball at OU (boo), everyone else in the family went to UT (yay!)

Nelson says... HAHAH, Aggies
Talk about hot- what’s hotter than victory?

Now we’ve got basketball– which is easy to focus on since all Longhorns are marinating in the win over Texas A&M this week. Obviously the bball roster is considerably smaller than baseball, and 10% the size of football- but there are still lots of cuties to watch. I’ll narrow it to three for you:

A.J. Abrams, G
bonus points: top returning scorer from last year’s Elite Eight team, and his dad’s a bodyguard
Kevin Durant, G/F
bonus points: doesn’t need any, he’s KEVIN DURANT
Craig Winder, G
bonus points: only senior on the team, loves mac’n’cheese

And last, but not least, let’s not forget the hotties in our other non-Big 3 sports: track, tennis, golf & swimming. With 11 national championships to their credit, we can’t leave them out. I had to narrow it to 4, though- here are the best of the rest:

Brian Beach – track – sprints
bonus points: he’s from Roanoke, TX- which just sounds cool
Ricky Berens – swimming – Fly/Free
bonus points: 2006 high school swimmer of the year
Bernhard Deussner – tennis
bonus points: he’s from Austria, and has 1 Austrian singles and 2 doubles titles
Poston Pritchett – swimming – Freestyle
bonus points: team captain, qualified to compete in the ’08 Olympic Trials
This entry was posted in Homer Hotties, NCAA baseball, NCAA basketball, NCAA football, Texas Gal, Texas Longhorns by Texas Gal. Bookmark the permalink.

About Texas Gal

Pitched four years for the Philadelphia Athletics, and then played shortstop for seven years for the Montreal Expos. Taught Rickey Henderson to steal a base. Taught Nolan Ryan to throw a punch. Taught Mickey Mantle to drink a beer. Threw one seven-hitter and seven no-hitters. Wonderboy was my creation, and first Jobu shrine was in my locker. Often called "the next Dustin Pedroia". Always wear high socks and eyeblack. Prefer to slide headfirst.

9 thoughts on “Homer Hotties: Texas Independence Day Edition

  1. Not only is he a Texan, he’s also an Austinite- which equals double hot points.

    I’m such a homer/obsessive Texan, I could probably put together a whole website devoted to nothing but hot Texans. It’s a sickness, I tell you…

  2. My father lived in Texas for two years when his job transfered him there. My mother and I decided to stay in SC because I really really didn’t want to go. God I was an idiot. I could have been revealing in the hotness that is the Texas Longhorns right now.

    I wait with baited breath for your post on the Street men. Is there a picture of Huston that doesn’t make you want to strip his clothes off and…wait, that’s just me? Yeah…I..uhh..gotta go…

  3. Lady A likes the German-speakers, huh? And Ricky was a nice little surprise gift waiting for me on the swimmers’ roster.

    And to answer your question, SA- no. No, such a picture of Huston does not exist. The Street men are FINE.

  4. Can I just say, this is the strangest blog I have ever seen.

    It’s also the most brilliant and the most orginal. Great job Ladies, fantastic blog.

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