Pink Locker Room

We’re back with another week of great college football. There were some fun upsets and we can all laugh at how Notre Dame has started 0-4 for the first time in the history of everything. Hee hee.

Metschick: Rutgers had a bye this week, as it prepares itself for Saturday’s game against the Maryland Terps. So, with no Scarlet Knights game to watch, I turned my eye to another Big East game: Syracuse @ Louisville. Imagine my surprise at seeing Syracuse, an 0-3 team, beating the Cardinals – and even though the final score was 38-35, it wasn’t that close for most of the afternoon. At one point, the Orange led 38-21. Never mind that Brian Brohm had 555 yards, his defense let him down. (Ed.’s note: Iowa dropped 35 points on ‘Cuse and held them scoreless. I’m just sayin’)

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Breaking: Mets Team Meeting Pics!


The Mets’ recent losing streak is taking a toll on D-Wright.  Can no one think of D-Wright?!

Enough is enough! My sources tell me that Willie Randolph called a team meeting after that dreadful game last night and really gave it to the Mets. My sources also provided photographs of what went down. They’re after the jump. Continue reading

Stand By Your Man – Fantasy QB Results: Week 2

Week 2 of the Stand By Your Man fantasy football league had two Ladies, (Andrea and Clare), already looking to their back-up boyfriends and featured hottie QBs that were going against each other in the Sunday Night Football game.

Metschick (De)Jesus’ Homies

vs

SA Woodson over Manning

Philip Rivers
11.76

Starting QB

Tom Brady
22.36

Alex Smith
4.94

Backup QB

Matt Hasselbeck
13.84

Eli Manning 13.44

“Just a friend”

Matt Leinart 14.56

113.06

Overall team score

221.56

Winning QB and Game winner – SA

Metschick - I hate you, Philip Rivers. Yeah, you played better this week, but you only got me 11 points, and the QB your team faced netted my opponent 22. Whatever, just get out of my sight.

SA - DREAMBOAT!!!! That’s all.

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Hit & Run: U-G-L-Y, You Ain’t Got No Alibi

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Damn, that was one ugly loss in D.C. Another four errors? 10 errors in the last two games? What is going on in that dugout? What’s going on in their heads? After getting a four-run lead, the starting pitching imploded, the bullpen did its usual job of pitching batting practice to the Washington Nationals (?!) and the defense needs to, uh, actually play defense. The final score was 12-4, and that’s an embarrassment for a team headed to the postseason. Actually, let me rephrase that – the Nationals are a major league team, and it’s not necessarily embarrassing to lose to them; the Mets’ play on the field is embarrassing right now. I don’t know who in that clubhouse is up for it, but someone needs to call a team meeting, and light some fire under their asses. Continue reading

Pink Locker Room

The tables have turned for the Ladies, some for the better and some….not so much. Metschick seems to be cruising along swimmingly and we all completely hate her and the Scarlet Knight she rode in on. (Just kidding, Metsy! Haha, don’t hurt me!) Follow me after the jump for contemplations, crying and cleavage….

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Stand By Your Man – Fantasy QB Results: Week 1

Love maybe blind to flaws and shortcomings, but after the Week 1 of the Ladies Fantasy Quarterback League, more of than a few of the Ladies might be wondering if they should lie to their main squeezes and say that they have to go to their grandmother’s house next Sunday while quietly sending their back-up hotties a few text-messages to see if they might be around for a booty call. You know. Just in case.

Holly JimBobCooterGaveMe6

vs

Clare Speckhosen

Peyton Manning
23.52

Starting QB

Rex Grossman
4.80

Did Not Play – Not sweaty
David Carr

Backup QB

Jon Kitna
25.26


Donovan McNabb 11.26

“Just a friend”

Matt Schaub 11.90

158.92

Overall team score

163.70

QB Winner – Holly and Peyton Manning
Overall Winner – Clare

In repeat of Super Bowl XLI, Colts’ hottie Peyton Manning had his way with the Bears’ Sexy Rexy who couldn’t find his way end zone against San Diego. Overall though, Team Speckhosen sports Terrell Owens, Plaxico Burress, Joseph Addai,Travis Henry, Antonio Gates, and Mike Vrabel. Which is to say, that girl Clare is stacked! Holly would have been better served if she played the homer card and started the Colts defense and their 20 points that were wasted on the bench, instead of the Dallas D which cost her a valuable point for being -1 at the end of the day.

How bad are the Raiders? Jon “Fuck Lion” Kitna was able to go for 289 yards, 3 TDs, give up 2 INTs, and still walk – Stray Cat Strut? – away with the win.
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Hit & Run

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The Detroit Tigers stunned the Toronto Blue Jays, scoring four runs in the bottom of the ninth to win 5-4. Roy Halladay pitched into the ninth, and was one out away from completing the game when he ran into trouble, giving up singles to consecutive Tigers. He was pulled for a reliever, who promptly gave up a 2-run single to Curtis Granderson. Placido Polanco then singled, and Gary Sheffield walked to load the bases, making way for Magglio Ordonez, who knocked in the winning runs. By the way, Granderson is only the third major leaguer to get 20 HR, 20 doubles, 20 triples and 20 steals in a season. Who’s your Tiger, indeed? Continue reading

Pink Locker Room

Welcome to the Pink Locker Room, where the Ladies have tickle fights, eat lots of bacon and talk college football. In the midst of all the NFLy goodness, we still had a fun day of football on Saturday. Let’s check in with our Ladies’ teams…..


Metschick
: WOO! RU won Friday night! It wasn’t a terribly pretty win, but I’ll take it. The Scarlet Knights scored 41, and the game was never really close, but seeing so many penalties was a little dismaying. I don’t want to imagine what a better team would do with all those mistakes. And dammit – I have to wait a week to see another game? (RU vs. Norfolk, 9/15/07) . Hottie Mike Teel pictured below:


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Ladies Fantasy Quarterback Draft – Stand By Your Man

The quarterback. The team leader. The play maker. The American symbol of all that is intelligent, strong, and virile. And as such, the quarterback is the ultimate fantasy position for the Ladies.

We thought we’d mix up the usual fantasy football draft this year and select just the hottest quarterbacks in the league. QB’s we can cheer for all season, not based on what they do for our team stats, but what they do to stir our passions both on and off the field.

Oh sure, we will have the rest of the team to think about too, but we are only really concerned with our football boyfriends. Our boys will play head-to-head in a two-division league, 14 week season with a three week playoff. Each Lady will select her main squeeze and the man she keeps on the side.

Serpentine draft order: Texas Gal, TheStarterWife, Andrea, Clare, Metschick, Holly, GordonShumway, and SA.

Texas Gal – On the clock –
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PSA: A Few Odds and Ends

Want an iPhone? Who doesn’t? They’re sexy, and all the big boys have them. Well, AA is introducing the Awful Announcing Pick ‘Em Challenge for the chance to win an iPhone. Sounds like fun, and who knows, you too can get your own 300-page bill from AT&T. (Seriously, go play – or we’ll hurt you.)
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Hit & Run

I’m hopped up on Ny-Quil, and slightly delirious after the Mets’ sweep of the Braves, so bear with me.

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The Mets division lead is back up to 5 games, thanks to said weekend sweep of the Braves, and yesterday’s 10-4 win over the Reds. Well, I guess I also have to thank the Marlins for taking 2 of 3 from the Phillies, and the Braves for beating the Phillies today (whew!). Pedro pitched 5 good innings, giving up 3 runs, 2 of them earned. The Mets’ offense woke up: Moises Alou, David Wright and Carlos Delgado all homered for the Mets. Let’s see if the bats can stay awake during this final stretch run. Continue reading

The Pink Locker Room

COLLEGE FOOTBALL IS HERE! Welcome to a new weekly feature here at Ladies: thoughts on our homer teams from the previous weekend. We’ve got 8 Ladies and 8 colleges, though that is because G-shum wants two and TSW just putters around the Ladies Batcave muttering about Yinzers and some Lawrence Fishburn-lookalike. Lots of great college football this past weekend, so let’s check in with all the Ladies after their teams’ first fall outings….. Continue reading

Real Men of Genius: Clay pitches a no-hitter!

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Congratulations, Clay Buchholz! Today, you pitched the game of your life. 9 innings, no hits, against the Baltimore Orioles. In your second major-league start. (Match that, Ian Kennedy!) Quite impressive, young man.

And not only do you pitch the hell out of that ball game, you gave a completely charming interview to What’s-her-face (Texy told me her name is Tina, but I prefer what’s-her-face). This line made me tear up (in happiness at your achievement): “It’s amazing. That’s all I can say. I’m in a blur right now.” You recognized that you had to call your parents, and I swooned at that. Well, at that, and the adorable Texan accent. You are now the 17th pitcher in Red Sox history to throw a no-no, and the first rookie pitcher to do so.

Congrats, and I hope you party tonight till you forget your name. I recommend Patron.

A few more pics after the jump… Continue reading

Hit & Run: The Race is on with Chase

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Chase Utley comes back from his hand injury, and goes 3-5 with a homer and 2 RBI, as the Phillies beat the Mets (sad Metsy) 9-2. I guess some other stuff happened, but I ignored that noise. Oh, I did see that it was some sort of mascot function at Citizens Bank Park, so I entertained myself with that. Alas, I couldn’t find any pictures of the mascot hotness, but I did see that some Spartan was there, as was the New Orleans Hornet, and Li’l Red (yeah, whoever that is). Also, I heard Keith Hernandez wonder why the flowers in the bullpen were purple and not red. Keith, you’re so weird. Continue reading

We’re This Many!!

Friends, we can hardly believe it ourselves:
Ladies… celebrates its six month anniversary today.

anniversary.jpg
(Artwork, as ever, courtesy of our incomparable Lady J-Money)

And what a ride. We’ve traveled into enemy territory, back to our alma maters, cross country to spring training, back home for Opening Day, seen legendary parks up close and raced to the bottom of too many pint glasses.

We’ve nursed all manner of inexplicable crushes in hilarious fashion.

We’ve taken to the streets and done a little spokesmodeling (step aside, Danbury Mint, and move over, Milano).

We’ve brought in guest stars from time to time, made ourselves at home elsewhere, and even gotten our parents in on the action.

We’ve seen grandiose plans exceed our highest expectations (this happened, right?) and crash in flames (let us never speak of this again).

And we’ve made it our mission to showcase the finest in baseball ass (and forearms!) from across the land, and to see that excellence is duly rewarded.

If you’re feeling indulgent (and who wouldn’t, after that cupcake?), join us after the jump for a highlight reel:

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Hit & Run

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Cal Ripken, Jr., was tapped by Condi Rice to be the U.S. Public Diplomacy Envoy. The administration wants him to spread the lovely to motivate through his integrity and iron man work ethic. About the appointment, Ripken said: “This is not a political statement for me necessarily. This is about the kids, and planning, you know, using baseball for good reasons.” Someone should send Ripken to the Middle East to solve that thing.

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EPL: Or as I like to call it, the Hottie Premier League

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Football is starting up once again over in England, and of course that means we have to review the hotties that abound back in the Mother Land.

So grab your Guinness, your fish and chips (yeah, I’ve never been to England, so I have no idea what else they eat), and your favorite EPL team’s kit, and join me after the jump. Continue reading

Hit & Run: Did anything happen last night?

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Robbie & Melky, so perfect together…

Yankees outfielder Melky Cabrera went 3-4, from the ninth hole, in the Yankees’ 5-4 win over the Blue Jays. This win brings Andy Pettite’s record to over .500; he also won consecutive games for just the first time this season. The Yankees have the best winning percentage in the Majors since the All Star break. (I prefer the Yankees of May.)

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Congrats, Tommy!

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Last night, Tom Glavine became only the 23rd pitcher to win 300 career games, and the first to do it as a Met. He pitched very well in 6 1/3 innings, and even helped his own cause by singling in the first run of the game.

It was hard at first for me to accept Mr. Glavine as one of the boys, as one of us. It’s not that I ever hated him as a Brave, because I really didn’t (as opposed to one John Rocker and one Chipper Jones). For me, it was just the hatred of the uniform. Once I realized that no, Glavine wasn’t with the Mets to sabotage them on behalf of the Braves (which, trust me, was no small feat, considering the way he pitched against the Braves the first two seasons he was with the Mets), I embraced him as whole-heartedly as I do the other Mets. (This video is also a big reason of why I could never really hate Tom Glavine.)

So, I’m full of pride for Tommy today, as I congratulate him on winning his 300th game, a crowning achievement in his Hall of Fame career. If you want all the good stuff on the game, head on over to Mets.com. And for much more eloquent fanalysis (fan analysis – what? I can make up words!), go to Faith and Fear in Flushing.

Howevah, if you want to see some pictures of the sweet lefty through the years, come with me… Continue reading

Love, Sports, and Dating – A peek into the minds of the Ladies

On any given day, we send each other between 50 and 200 emails. (70% sports, 15% website chatter, 7% pillow fighting and baby oil discussion, 4% on how our lives are going, 4% on how much we hate other blogs that shall remain nameless.)

So in the spirit of the CHEEZE DOODLE BACON PANTS post, here is the thread that took place this week in response to Chris Mottram’s post on Mr. Irrelevant about dating women who like the NFL. The conversation runs from dating guys who didn’t like sports, bar fights, holding your tongue as not to show up your sweetie in front of his crew, and eventually to my new favorite word, “douchesnozzle”.

Leading up to this point, we had been talking about Metschick’s new boyfriend… Continue reading

Rocking The Plate

You’re standing in the on-deck circle, taking a few practice cuts and watching your teammate at the plate out of the corner of your eye.

Strike three.
Inhale. Grip tightens. Exhale.

You’re up.

36,000 of your closest friends are on hand to watch. Couple million more at home. And you haven’t made the highlight reel all week.

And there it is – that perfect song is blaring out over the loudspeakers.

Now you’re ready to do battle.

Let’s imagine for a moment that all of the Ladies… are major league baseball players. Yes, I know this would present a difficult quandary regarding whether we would ogle our own asses, forearms and eyeblack on this site (maybe we could spin off a “Gentlemen…” blog?). But the more important question is: What song would each of the Ladies… use as her at-bat music?

This is not a simple question- picking just one track to use as your theme music every single time you step up to the plate is tough. Do you go Classic Rock? Hip-Hop? Metal? I’m sure there are some pretty rockin’ hillbilly beats from Tennessee that Holly could use. (Holly’s note: Oh, you want hillbilly beats? I got your hillbilly beats RIGHT DAMN HERE.)

After some solo deliberation (using whatever criteria she chose), each Lady… submitted to me the piece of music that should play over the P.A. speakers when she stepped out of the on-deck circle and into the batter’s box. The other Ladies… haven’t even seen these yet. Take a gander at the lineup after the jump – and try and tell me this wouldn’t be an intimidating bunch to square off against at the plate.

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Becksiest Man Alive: The Ladies… Endorse:

TattoedMess(iah)
“I’d be honored if I were Ladies… endorsed. That’s the gold seal of approval these days.”

Deadspin commenter, musician and all-around funny guy TattooedMess(iah) is our choice for Becksiest Man Alive. TattooedMess is a 19 year-old hunk of burning love hailing from the great state of Florida. His ultimate goal is to be a recording artist and to own his own record label. He has a great blog going on and he also writes his own music. Here at Ladies, we appreciate a good sense of humor, ambition, and nicely defined V muscles, so we’d like to endorse him in the Deadspin Becksiest Man Alive Contest. Continue reading

Baseballs. Bats. Berman. Liveblogging the Home Run Derby

What’s more fun than a meaningless Home Run Derby that drags on for 3 hours, broadcast by a Baker-Berman tagteam (and assisted by Kenny Mayne… in a kayak), chockfull of 1,000 player’s kids plus lameass interviews of both Bonds AND ARod? That same Home Run Derby… when liveblogged by the Ladies…!


Ryan Howard doesn’t have time for ballcaps- he’s got HRs to hit!

Each of the Ladies… claimed one of the 8 Derby participants for her very own– and then we all gathered together to revel in the inanity, discuss the intricacies of the hot butts on display, and make fun of ARod. Play along with us after the jump…

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