UPDATED Announcement: Welcome your new Ladies…!

If you follow us on Twitter, you’ve gotten a pretty good idea of things that would not be announced on this site. Now, at long last, it’s time to let you in on what WILL be announced.

We have chosen our new Ladies…! We got a ton of great applications, and it wasn’t easy to choose. Thanks to everyone who applied, and please keep your eyes open to future Ladies… opportunities – we heart all of you! In no particular order, here’s  a bit about each of our new writers.

***UPDATE*** Due to a slight technical difficulty (in my brain), we neglected to include ALL of the new Ladies… in this here post. In addition to the warm welcome you’ve already given our 7 other newcomers, please take a moment to get to know the awesome CuteSports.

Friday Football Foodie: The Before And After Edition

So, here we are going into the final week of regular season NFL play, smack between Christmas and New Year’s. I thought that perhaps a nice Italian drink and appetizers would suffice. Something different and easy. Fix this trio of Bruschetta with Gorgonzola Cheese and Honey, Capreze Salad Bites, and Prosecco Digestif. Sit back, relax, de-stress and get ready for Sunday … and 2009.

The Tailgate with Games Mistress: Hot Fudge Pudding Cake

Now that it’s been cold enough to break out the wool sweaters, it’s time to share with you all my favorite winter desert: Hot Fudge Pudding Cake. This is a really easy recipe and it’s great for those cold, wet game days when you just want to curl up and watch the game in your warm, dry house.

Wouldn't you rather stay indoors and have some chocolate?

Friday Football Foodie – The Sunday After Thanksgiving

Okay, this should have been up on Friday. But I figured who wants to eat much the day after Thanksgiving? Instead, I’m here to show you today how to make a patty melt and vanilla ice cream shake. Warning – you will need an ice cream maker for this … but you still have time to ask for one for Christmas, right? If you’re like me, and not feeling very well because you’re still recovering from the first winter cold of the season, you’ll get your sweetie to make these dishes. And be patient when you click to view on – the pics take a bit of time to load, but are well worth it.

Things CC could buy with $140MM

Last week the New York Yankees offered free agent CC Sabathia a contract worth $140 million over six years. Sometimes when I hear about baseball contracts, it’s just a flurry of numbers: Millions and years, incentives and more millions. But this offer…yow. That’s a ton of money, Holmes.

If Sabathia accepts these boatloads of cash, what could he do with it all?

This Bugatti...and so much more. SO much.

The Tailgate with Games Mistress: Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars

I’m not a good cook.  One of my New Year’s resolutions this year was to do more cooking for myself, under the theory that more practice would mean less burning things; that resolution lasted through two weeks of undercooked poultry and watery sauces before I went back to my old habit of frozen dinners and pasta.  However, there are about five recipes on which my results are consistently kickass, mostly because they are very, very simple.  Simple I can do.

So, without further ado, my recipe for Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars (named last Sunday by the friend that ate about one third of the batch pictured in this post).

Pay no attention to the messy kitchen behind the ingredients.

The Tailgate… with Andrea

We’re welcoming the NFL season by bringing back our weekly food post. This week, I’m going to kick things off by showing you how to make a Cheezy Football and a pitcher of Sparklers.  Let’s start with the Sparklers, so that you can drink while you make your Cheezy Football.

Mmm, champagne.

Because it’s not the CWS without a little nudity!

Farewell, dearest Tigers of Louisiana State. Right before Tim Federowicz launched his grand slam in the top of the 9th inning (in what had been a tie game), I heard an LSU fan say, “Oh, this guy only has 4 homers this year; we can get him.”

And just like that, they did not “get him.” UNC went on to win 7-3 to send LSU home, and continue its own quest to finish in 2nd place in the College World Series…again. But there was a streaker! Check out the ground crew guy’s tackle!!

I had never been to a sporting event where there was a streaker. Now I have been, and it was at least as hilarious as I had always imagined.

Hot Chocolate

While flipping through the pages of a People magazine recently, I saw an ad for M&Ms with NASCAR representative Kyle Busch as an M&M character. It makes sense, because they sponsor his car/team/whatever. Now, don’t get me wrong and I mean no offense, but I’m not a huge fan of racing or Busch. Still, it got me thinking about what other hot guys would look like as an M&M. It can’t be bad, right, combining two things women love – chocolate and really good-looking, fit athletes. So, I sent out a request to the Ladies… for their all-time favorite hottie and a pic. Follow me after the break to see who picked who and what the M&M Generator came up with.

Thirsty Thursday

I love alcohol. Beer, wine, mixed drinks. They all have their place. Here are some of my favorites.

At the baseball game:

What can I say? I’m a Cardinals fan. They play in Busch Stadium. Nothing beats an ice-cold Bud Light at a day game in the summer. And you only have to sell ONE kidney to afford a couple beers, which leaves you one kidney leftover! Everybody wins!

How To Get In Shape With These Hotties

I don’t know about you guys, but I am really looking forward to vacation this summer. I mean checking and re-checking my airline seat assignments excited! Except for the fact that I’m going somewhere warm, with a waterpark, and I’m going to have to wear a swimsuit. Now, I truly do want to work out; I just wish I had the dedication. Or even just someone with a cattle prod to move me along. But I don’t. I’ve had memberships to gyms I’ve never used. I have an expensive machine in the spare room that is covered with dust. Dusting it might be the most exercise I’ve had in months. I’ve even had times I’ve planned to walk with a friend where I’ve begged off – feigning illness. I’m one of those women, ashamedly, who thinks having kids is workout enough. I need some motivation to get fit. And I think I’ve found it. Follow me to find out how to “get fit by summer,” after the jump.

The annals of cool vegans: Pat Neshek

That’s one hot vegan.

I saw this tiny item at the bottom of Paul Hagen’s Baseball Notes today:

Twins reliever Pat Neshek was dominant early last season, but had a 4.83 earned run average in the second half. He thinks the fade might have been caused by an unhealthy lifetsyle, so he’s become a vegan.

I couldn’t believe what I was reading, so I went to Neesh’s blog and sure enough, it’s true! From the March 13 entry:

The last time I ate a whopper jr. was in 2004…the article never gave a date but people might have thought I ate those things last year…not the case. I didn’t go Vegan to do better on the field or improve my game, the article makes it sound like I was looking for answers and this is what I came up with, not the case. I feel like the article was suppose to be about me getting stronger and how I struggled late last season and in some odd way the vegan thing got tied in. … For the most part of the season last year I was vegetarian (didn’t tell anyone) if I had the choice and when we were on the road I really didn’t have a choice and ate what the clubby had or whatever restaurant was close…who cares. This really isn’t new to me its just another step that I’m trying out. I’m not telling anyone to go out and go vegan, I’m not here to say this is the best thing in the world, as is everything I do on here I’m telling my story and shedding light into the life of a ballplayer…

Aside from the defensive tack he takes, this is a really cool news item. How many major league pitchers are vegans? Pat, you have to come to Citizens Bank Park–PETA says we have the best vegetarian ballpark food!

Friday Football Foodie – Super Bowl Spread

We made it. Four weeks of pre-season. (Five if you count the Hall of Fame game.) 17 weeks of the regular season. Four weeks of play offs.

Now, it has become fashionable to consider the Super Bowl almost down-right irrelevant. Too much hype. Too much of a spectacle. Too much Ryan Seacrest. For sports tourists.

Bullshit is what I say.

If this game did not matter, it would not hurt that my team is not in it. If this game did not matter then why have I been sucked in to watching pretty much every rerun on the NFL Network the last two weeks of previous playoffs and Super Bowls. If this game did not matter, then why did we all bother to watch the last 26 weeks of play?

Being a football fan and not caring about the last game of the season would be like watching Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, and The Return of the Jedi and stopping the film when Han and Leia are captured on Endor, the Rebel fleet is trapped, and Luke has yet to confront Darth Vader.

It is leaving Woodstock before Jimi Hendrix plays.

Why do I bring this up? 1) I believe the spectacle of pro-football week after week is what makes it special. 2) You don’t have to be over-exposed to the hype if you don’t want to be. It is not that hard to avoid sports coverage if you choose to do so. 3) I really have no good way of wrapping up the Football Foodie for the season, and when I am tired am prone to hyperbole.

So how about a Friday Football Foodie retrospective for the best of the best. Sure fire hits if your a fan, a fanatic, or just a tourist.

The Game Plan: A Primer

So I took a break from my thrillicious morning (read: applying for middle management jobs at Tire Kingdom) to check out the The Game Plan, the latest escapee from the Disney DVD vault, starring The “Dwayne Johnson” Rock. Mr. Rock plays Joe Kingman, the QB of the Boston Rebels who loves himself, football, and Elvis—in that order—although his Elvis worship is perhaps based on their mutual nickname, “The King”. The Rebels have plowed through their opponents to reach the playoffs of the Unnamed-For-Copyright-Reasons football league and Joe is a big part of their success, mainly because he refuses to pass to his teammates in favor of running in all of the touchdowns himself.*

It just takes one glance at the suitcase-toting pixie beside him on the DVD case, and we can surmise that things are going to change for Joe**, that he won’t be spending many more evenings alone, watching and re-watching Sportcenter segments about himself (which is how I imagine Terrell Owens spends his free time).

The night after a party involving Russian models and, um, teammates leaving early to get home to their families (Right, like you expected Playmakers), Joe answers a knock at his door and learns that the girl standing in the hall is the result of one of his, um, naked bootlegs. Now before you spew some Tom Brady/Matt Leinart-style snark, allow me to point out that Joe was married to her mother, Sarah, and they were divorced before she knew she’d been quarterback sneaked. And she’s now off providing fresh drinking water to the drought-ravaged children of the Sudan***, so don’t hate.

Old-School WWF

For a chance to win a prizes (or just to show off), we’ve set up some rasslin’ trivia. Yesterday, your intellects were tickled by Clare’s trivia. Today, we’re hopping in our Delorean and going back to old-school wrestling. I grew up watching these guys (Royal Rumbles were my FAVORITE. They were SO exciting.) Since these wrestlers were popular 15-20 years ago, we’re simply going to test your memories in a Name That Wrestler contest.

Email andrealeigh203@gmail.com with your answers. Do not put your answers in the comments. (Because then other people can see them). You have until Thursday at 2 pm EST. Some of these are gimmes, but some are damn obscure. We gotta separate the boys from the men. Or the girls from the women. Or the jezebels from the ladies. You get the idea.

We’ll start off with an easy one…but do you know who the lady is?

Rocking it out with Dwayne Johnson

A few weeks ago, the good people at Disney contacted us to tell us Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s movie The Game Plan was coming out on DVD today and did we want to do a little something about it?

In about five minutes, our afternoon email round robin took a decidedly “OMG THE ROCK!! SQUEEEEEEE!!” tone. So today and tomorrow, we’re grooming our eyebrows and sharpening our People’s elbows to bring you Rocky goodness in review, flashback and quiz form.

And you can win stuff! That’s right! We have real, honest to blog prizes to give away.

Smell what the Ladies… are cooking after the jump.

Friday Football Foodie – Limping into the playoffs

Saying that I am behind on the Friday Football Foodie is a bit of an understatement, but in a weird way my performance is not that different from how many teams ended the season.

Week 16 – Dec 20, 22, 23 - In a Thursday night game against the Rams, Steelers running back and league leading rusher Willie Parker goes out with a broken fibula. FFF is not posted due to food poisoning from a bad turkey sandwich. (It was going to be about the above Steelers sugar cookies* with buttercream frosting and these great pumpkin spice cookies** that are perfect for the holidays. Sent batches out to all of the Ladies and Tuffy.)

Week 17 – Dec 29, 30 – Every playoff bound team is resting their starters if they can. FFF is not posted due to lack of internet at a spa retreat. (Athletes get deep tissue massages and feel a great sense of relief; I get a deep tissue massage and am sore for two days.) There is something to resting your starters though. Who knows when injury can happen. The FFF’s camera which had been on the fritz for awhile was dropped onto a marble floor at the spa from which it will never recover, thus hurting the FFF’s playoff run.

Wild Card Playoffs – Jan 5, 6 – Pressure, pressure, pressure, come up with a game plan THAT DOES INVOLVE BRUCE ARIANS HOW CAN YOU SAY HE’S COMING BACK NEXT SEASON. FFF is not posted due to poor clock management, stress, and more stress.

Which means the Friday Football Foodie is much like the Colts right now; Haven’t had a game that tested them since Week 14 against the Ravens and are completely beat up.***

Friday Football Foodie – Christmas Lites: Low-fat veggie dips, lite mixers, and seasoned popcorn review

You know how way back in the beginning of the Friday Foodies I said -

“It is the one time of the week you don’t have to worry about calories, fat, and never have to say, “Oh, no. I cannot possibly eat another bite, I’m full. And can I have a water, please? Beer makes bloated.” It is in fact, a perfect day

And I meant it. I really, really, really meant it.

Except for around the Holidays. If your office is anything like my office, you have not had to worry about breakfast, lunch, or your 4pm snack due to the massive amounts of cakes, cookies, and candy that show up in the kitchen each day. Rarely do I crave sweets, but put free mini-muffins by the coffee maker? I’ll stab an assistant who thinks they are going to get the last lemon poppy seed muffin before me with their own letter opener.

Put that together with a few parties each week – anything from your friends tree decorating gathering complete with egg nog to the work parties that by 2am you’re splitting the last bottle of Patron with the blonde in from Annex while gobbling up the last of the Coconut Shrimp – and you’re looking at packing on 5-8 pounds before Nate Washington has dropped his first ball of the game.

New Year’s Eve is only sixteen days away, so eat healthy this Sunday. Give your stomach and your skinny jeans a fighting chance.

This Week: Veggie Dip, Creamy Roasted Red Pepper Dip, Lite Drink Mixers, and Popcorn Seasons

You will need for the Veggie Dip:

Friday Football Foodie – Precious Roy Presents Gumbo, White Chocolate Bread Pudding, and Skylabs

Today’s Friday Football Foodie is brought to you by stats guru, writer, runner, and hot blogger Precious Roy from Kermit the Blog.

You know what I love? Cooking. Fucking love it. So much so that I should probably be barefoot and pregnant in a kitchen right now, Well, except for the fact that I’m missing an x-chromosome and I’ve got a penis. And shoes.

Anyway, I’ll stop sounding like this is the Jamboroo. It’s food. So it probably doesn’t need dick jokes.

Okay, this week we’re actually cooking for the Monday Nighter. It’s probably going to be a gawdawful game but we’re going to eat so well that nobody will even notice. Either that or we’ll hit people with so many calories they’ll go into a food coma and have no idea what happened when they stumble into work the next day.

It’s New Orleans and Atlanta. So we’re making a traditional Freaknik meal.

Just kidding. We’re cooking with the ‘Aints in mind even if it is a road game and we’re making a big pot of gumbo, white chocolate bread pudding for dessert, and for drink, we’ll be downing Skylabs. And God help you if you have more than two of them.

This all might look a little daunting. It’s not. It’s just detailed. The only other heads-up you need is to read through to see how much prep time you need (especially with the bread pudding as you might want to jump on that a day ahead)

Gumbo

You’ll need –

Friday Football Foodie – Happy Endings

Sometimes you just have to get out of the house, despite all the comforts of home. Maybe you want to have a crowd around you. Maybe you don’t get the NFL Network or the Sunday Ticket. Maybe you unwisely painted your house over the Thanksgiving break, and between the fumes and the giant pile of stuff that you have to move back into place and OMG STARTERBOYFRIEND YOU SUGGESTED THIS MESS NOW GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE BEFORE I BEAT YOU WITH THE PAINT ROLLER AND NO I DO NOT THINK THAT GREEN FOR THE LIVING ROOM IS TOO MINTY AND NO YOU CANNOT HIRE DAY LABORERS AT HOME DEPOT, I DON’T CARE HOW FUNNY THAT EPISODE OF SOUTH PARK WAS.

Ahem. Yes, we went Happy Endings twice last weekend to escape and watch sports.

Sunday afternoon we better prepared to do a Foodie review, and invited Signal2Noise to join us in food and football, the greatest combination in the world.

So what happens when a former chain location goes frat house? Mostly better than you expect, with a few drawbacks.

Friday Football Foodie – Smörgåsbord – UPDATED WITH GAME PLAY

Quick update I’m throwing at the top, since I was too hungover to really talk football this morning.  You have to play “The Last Hope“, a great little game done by the guys over at Doubt About It.   (Found via Christmas Ape’s DC Steeler Nation.)  Power ups are Lombardi trophies, Art Rooney, and hottie Tomlin. I will probably spend the rest of the day on this.    Now back to the main post. 

When I was in the high school choir, the greatest thing you could look forward too was the trip to Disneyworld for choral competition. (I believe they use the word “adjudication” instead of “competition”, but that’s besides the point.)

Anyway, one of the highlights of this trip was a visit to the Swedish Smörgåsbord restaurant, not because of the Medieval Times feel of the place but because there is nothing funnier to a bunch of 15 year-olds that saying “Swedish Smörgåsbord… Bork bork bork” at least 10,000 times on the flight down. (Which is reaches its point of hilarity when one of the Karas asks a very black man if he is he “Swedish chef” at one of the carving stations, not even thinking for a second that might possibly be one of the most offensive questions ever uttered in Orlando.)

So what is my point? It has been a really busy week here at TSW HQ what with birthdays, going out to various events every night with two more parties yet to go this weekend (I’m starting to seriously get the Vince Vaughn / Jon Cusack bloat going on this week with all the drinking and such) and I really didn’t get it together to do a decent FFF. As a matter of fact, I am putting this together at 9:30 in the morning hoping to get it done by 10 so I am not too late for work.

What does this mean for you fine reader? It means I am going to just throw up a smattering of pictures of things that have been going on here with a receipe or two mixed in and calling it a Smörgåsbord.

Friday Football Foodie: Add Meat, Add Cheese, Repeat.

Welcome to my very first Football Foodie, a post that gives me an excuse to take photographs of my kitchen and to make a meal that doesn’t involve corn dogs. Or this.

Today we’re going to make a variation on the muffuletta sandwich. “Muffuletta” is an Italian word that means “I hope you own a defibrillator”. It is also the title of a movie I once saw on Spectravision. This ginormous sandwich is can be prepared up to 24 hours in advance, requires no actual cooking, and will give you the opportunity to purchase a variety of meats and cheeses. Let’s get started…

Friday Football Foodie: Cheese Straws, Apple Joujous, & 3 Musketeers Mint Minis

Two of the things I miss the most about living in the South are Volunteer football and my hetero lifemate Livia. This weekend also happens to be University of Tennessee Homecoming, so I’m here with a little of both–her recipe for cheese straws, and the family formula for apple joujous, staple of the finest tailgates.

Things You Will Need:

Friday Football Foodie – Breakfast Strata and Blueberry Beer Reviews

We all know how debilitating a bye week can be. My Steelers were flat in the first half of last week’s game against the Broncos after the bye. (I prefer not to thinking about the fact that of all the teams that had bye in that Week 6 – Bills, Broncos, Lions, Colts, Steelers, and 49ers – Pittsburgh and San Francisco were the only ones who lost in Week 7.) In the World Series, we’re seeing what a nine-day layoff can do to a team on a winning streak.

What am I saying other than I have no idea what to use for an intro this week? I’m saying that I made this strata about three weeks ago and when I opened up the pictures, it took me a little bit to remember what I had done. The good thing about football and stratas is that if you remember the basics, ball in the end zone, blocking, bread and egg custard, the rest is up to you.

This week: Breakfast Strata and Reviews of Blueberry Beers – Kennebunkport Blueberry Wheat Ale, SeaDog Bluepaw Wheat Ale, and Marin Brewing Company Blueberry.

You will need…

Friday Football Foodie – Cuban Sandwiches, Tonics, and Smokin’ BBQ Cheddar Chips

Up to this point, all of the FFF posts have been items that you make beforehand so your ass can sit in its rightful place on the sofa come kickoff.

Since my team had the BYE last week, I was able to relax a little (DAMMIT WARD GET HEALTHY ALREADY) and make a football snack that required me to spend a little more time in the kitchen. (As I have noted before, I have this small superstition that if you are more concerned about the action off the field at game time, the more likely it is that your team is going to lose. My mojo/karma/good wishes were certainly not required for the Dolphins-Browns and Pats-Cowboys games.)

This week: Cuban Sandwiches, Tonics, and new product review – Smokin’ BBQ Cheddar Chips

You will need -

Friday Football Foodie – Dave’s Hot Beef Dip, Kahlua and Coffee, and Salt & Pepper Pita Chips

This week’s Friday Football Foodie dish was submitted by Dave’s Football Blog, home to anything foot and ball. Soccer of every color and stripe, rugby, Aussie rules, CFL, and of course, American gridiron. (Dave also runs a chill music podcast over at Dave’s Lounge, which I highly recommend.)

Dave first posted the recipe for the Hot Beef Dip back for Super Bowl XL – predicting a Steelers’ win, naturally – but this recipe is really too good to wait for a special event game, especially as we head into fall and heartier football snacking.

You will need…

Friday Football Foodie – Overnight French Toast Casserole and Framboise

Sometimes it takes two things to make one great performance. Sigfried and Roy. Captain and Tennille. Matt Leinart and Kurt Warner. (Although Leinart better shutty-his-uppy about splitting time with Warner, and remember that his team won with the two-QB system last week.)

The FFF is back to brunch this week for the 10am games in the PST, with a recipe that part Paula Deen’s Baked French Toast Casserole and part The Joy of Cooking’s Overnight Baked French Toast. (Recipe not online, page 809 in the 1997 edition.)

Part of the beauty of this dish is all the work – what little work there is – is done the evening before brunch, leaving you to sleep in until past 9am on game day for a change. (And I bet Paula Deen would cry less than Leinart over sharing the creation of this breakfast.)

You will need…

Friday Football Foodie: Cucumber-feta dip, PUDDING SHOTS! and the Dunkin’ Donuts Extreme Bacon Extravaganza

This week, TSW has a bye and I’m calling the plays on the Friday Football Foodie.

It might be heresy to some to include vegetable matter in their football food plans that a) doesn’t come on top of a pizza or b) doesn’t accompany a bratwurst, but I cannot have a party without putting out veggies and dip. Besides, you’re getting a jump on the “eat veggies and fruit for the rest of the week” edict that usually comes with the FFF.

Not to worry, though: There’s no cooking — just chopping and stirring — and the Drink of the Week doubles as dessert!

Friday Football Foodie – Four Cheese and Roasted Red Pepper Quiche, Bloody Marys, and Budweiser Chelada

One of the greatest thing about living on the West Coast is the football brunch. Wake up, walk out to couch, turn on TV, football is there.

True, this tends to work out better for my guests than me, (I’m generally up around 8 AM in a panic that I need to get brunch ready before the game, more on this later), and sometimes it is 9:53 PST and you are screaming at your network connection, “MOVE FASTER YOU FUCKING INTERNET! I HAVE ABOUT FOUR MORE MOVES TO MAKE IN THIS LEAGUE AND TWO MORE LEAGUES TO DOUBLE CHECK BEFORE KICK-OFF! FUCK YOU SLOW INTERNET! MOVE!”, but all and all, after a rough transition to living in Pacific Standard Time after a lifetime in the MST and EST, I can say there is no better way to watch football. (Plus, if you over-sleep and miss ESPN Gameday, you’re actually doing yourself a favor, whereas when you live back East, you’re so ready for the games to start, you’ll suffer through anything just to see men running around the field.)

Four Cheese and Roasted Red Pepper Quiche, Bloody Marys, and Budweiser Chelada

You will need..

Friday Football Foodie – 9-Layer Ranchero Dip Kickoff Special

Your fantasy picks are set. You have put fresh batteries in the Tivo remote for your own instant replays. You have either ordered the NFL Sunday Ticket or have memorized the NFL local broadcast and blackout maps.

You are ready for football.

You have been training for this for weeks. Pizza Loaves with Watermelon-Vodka Slushees, Buffalo Chicken Dips with Blueberri Stoli Lemon Fizz, Mexican Pinwheels and Mary Pickfords, and homemade corn dogs with Rusty Nails. You even took a field trip out to check out some local Chicago sports bars over on Deadspin.

You are ready for football.

And on this, the holiest of weekends until the playoffs start, you are ready to tackle the greatest Football Foodie dish there is known to fans everywhere: The 9-Layer Rachero Dip. Also this week, Cocktail of the Week’s “Lucky Glass” and New Product Review: NBC’s Sunday Night Football has their own “Football Foodies”.

You will need -