Hit & Run: Late Edition

The ESPYs were filmed in Los Angeles last night.  Fun!  That’s Adriana Lima and her fiance Marko Jaric, of the Memphis Grizzlies.  She’s a Victoria’s Secret supermodel, and that’s the best she can do?  I’m sure he’s making money, but he is not that attractive. Adriana, you fail.

Danica Patrick looks great, although I’m not crazy about that belt.  But what do I know, I’m wearing an Oscar the Grouch t-shirt right now.  All the other pics were of Justin Timerlake and Zac Efron.  Pass.

Here we have Jes-, I mean Tim Tebow.  Don’t like the suit.  NEXT!

It’s so nice of Michael Strahan to help Eddie Murphy’s sloppy seconds.  She looks as if she’d bite his head off after mating.

Brady Quinn panicked when he realized he’d double-booked last night, but that was easily solved by bringing his baby-sitting charge with him.  Seriously, how old is she?   12?

Meanwhile, Matt Leinart looks as if he’s on his way to some librarians’ convention.  Really, Matt?  Really?!

Now, this Matt is dressed a lot better.  Kemp’s also got that sexy squint thing going on. 

Eli Manning and his wife Abby make a very cute couple.  Can’t even snark on them. 

Holy crap, Lisa Leslie is TALL.  I mean, I knew that she was tall, but until you see her next to a person of average height, you don’t get just how tall she is.  I also like his pic because I think it’s funny when people appear to be freakishly short.  (It makes sense in my head.)

Cristiano Ronaldo made it to the ESPYs, even hough he is suffering from some type of greasy skin disease.  Or some leg thing.  One or the other.

Here’s everyone’s favorite alleged sexual assailant, Colt Brennan.  Good choice on the shirt, really brings out those gorgeous eyes.

Bret Favre attended with his mother, I assume.  Mrs. Favre, if you are indeed Mrs. Favre, please take your son far, far away.  He bores me.

Braylon Edwards looked pimp last night. I’d hit it.

Remember, the ESPYs air on Sunday, at 8 pm.

30 thoughts on “Hit & Run: Late Edition

  1. Do not like Danica’s hair. Also, My GOSH Ronaldo, are you trying to make me stop loving you? All white outfit and you couldn’t even powder your face a bit?? I know you wear make up! It’s time to invest in a nice powder compact.

  2. Danica isn’t exactly average height-she’s a little on the short side. And I wouldn’t have such an issue with her belt if it wasn’t paired with those shoes!

    See, people, we’re girly girls!

  3. C-Ron looks like hell; I didn’t know that was possible.

    I’m not sold on Kemp’s ensemble. I don’t like the plaid and the print on the tie together. One or the other might be fine, but I don’t like that he’s wearing both.

    And the librarian version of Matt Leinart? Would still do.

  4. Oh man Metsy…Brady Quinn…C-Ron (even though he looks terrible)…and Colt? Hot-Damn…Too bad Grady wasn’t there.

    For the record, I LOVE Zac Efron, so a pic of him here would have been cool with me.

  5. Gradavid, word! On being 5’2″, Ronnie, and Danica’s hair! 3 for 3!

    Metsy, okay, our secret…btw he’ll be 21 in Oct…so we’re kinda like TSW and her love for Sid. At least I dont like the Jonas brothers, right?

  6. Co-signing MC — hair issues with Danica. And I can’t find the picture but I saw one one of Lisa Leslie posing with her book on the red carpet. Weird. WTF Matt Leinart… and if Braylon left the bedazzler at home, I’d hit it too. Not even talking about Cristiano.

  7. Rapid fire: Tebow’s banging Erin Andrews so he could wear a suit made of honey and deadly fire ants for all I care… I’d be jealous of Brady Quinn if I didn’t know that he was more interested in her brother… Shannon Sharpe looks nice in a dress… I had no idea Ronaldo was a severe burn victim… the fuck is wrong with Colt’s forehead?

  8. All I can say is that Adriana’s fiance must have one hell of a personality because, damn, he is goofy looking!

  9. I too have a secret love for all things Zac Efron but he looked absolutely awful last night. Weird Leif Garrett hair. Creepy not-quite-a-smile. Tried to go for the unshaved look but just looked dirty.Not sure what he was doing there….http://justjared.buzznet.com/2008/07/16/zac-efron-espy-awards-2008/
    Instead, I shall remember this…http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/RSPOD/RS1033~Zac-Efron-Rollling-Stone-no-1033-August-2007-Posters.jpg

  10. Here’s why pic comments are important:

    I didn’t even notice the librarian get-up on ML until I read the comment. I was just happy to see that he’s got that hair and beard under control. YUMMY.

    I *did* think CR was some unknown female athlete with same-sex tendencies before I read the pic comment.

    If you won’t snark on Eli, I will, but I’ll leave it off of here. It could get ugly. I’m going to go back and look at Jonathan Johnston to distract myself from that unpleasant topic.

  11. My parents would not have let me out of the house wearing Danica’s dress. Actually, I would not let my own daughter out in something that short (if I had a kid).

    Eli and his wife are a cute couple.

  12. Matt Leinart looks approximately six seconds away from sitting down to change his shoes while singing “It’s a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood”. (Correct as usual, King Friday!)

  13. Hmmm … I guess Brady Quinn broke up with the chick he was with at the draft. Guess going twenty-second put a strain on their relationship.

    And if Marko Jaric’s eyes were about an inch farther apart I’d hit it.

    And Eli Manning has learned to comb his hair. Or let his wife do it.

  14. cristiano is the hotest man i’ve never seen , i’ll give all what i’ve got if i can spend some time with this amazing person

  15. Mike Strahan’s wife is busted. Just when you thought Tom’s wife was overrated for beauty and curves nobody sees except the media and the sheep who believe the media’s every word and have no eyes of their own, here comes this rapter/dragonfly. I mean why Mike, why? She looks like that thing in Species. Not the chick but the thing the chick turns into. Mike’s wife is just plain ugly to……..I mean I’m just saying…….did I mention she’s ugly too?

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