Pink Locker Room

Another week of college football sees undefeated Boston College fall to Florida State, which I laughed pretty hard about. AZ State fell to Oregon, leaving Ohio State, Kansas and Hawaii as the only unbeaten teams left. Personally, I’d like to see the National Title game as some combination from Oregon, Oklahoma and LSU, but if Kansas and Ohio State stay undefeated…we could end up with the most horrible National Title game EV-ER. Manboobs McCupcakes versus Cheaty McSweatervest. A real barn-burner whenever those two teams get together. But let’s find out how the Ladies’ teams did…

Metschick: I wasn’t able to watch Rutgers’ latest loss, as I was at my 10 year HS reunion. But I knew we were losing because I kept checking the score on my cellphone. I really have no words for this game. Rutgers had good games statistically from Mike Teel, Kevin Britt and Ray Rice. Yet they still lost. 511 yards of losses and they still lost? Clearly they weren’t making the big play when it mattered. When I looked over the schedule at the beginning of the season, I decided to go to the UConn game, because I assumed it’d be an RU win. Yeah, right. UConn is quietly having an excellent season (until they run into WVU), and they’ll be playing meaningful games in November, while RU has to beat Pittsburgh and Army to get to, like, the Papajohns.com Bowl.

And if RU goes to the Papajohns.com Bowl – I’m NOT going to Alabama!

SA: I’m starting to feel bad for Sparty a little. It seems like year after year they get their hopes for the upcoming season crushed in some horrible way. Granted State didn’t have any hopes for a Big Ten title, but a win against Michigan would have been a huge jumping off point for their team next season. ‘Twas not to be as Michigan, down 10 with seven minutes to go, scored two touchdowns to win 28-24. Chad Henne, despite being hurt, had four TD’s with 211 yards. Mario Manningham showed once again why he is “The New Math.” And now Michigan, even with a loss next week at Wisconsin, will play Ohio State at home November 17 for the Big Ten title. And, you know, stop OSU MNC title game hopes.

Holly: I didn’t get to see my Homecoming game yesterday, but 59-7 speaks for itself. I’m sure we’ll oblige the East with a loss–I can’t imagine us getting through Arkansas, Vandy, and Kentucky with even two wins–but this is 2007. Who knows. What’s freaking me out more is the mutation of our defense. We’ve gone from not bothering to show up for games to a shade of our former smashmouth selves….to a team that blocks punts and makes interceptions. TWO defensive touchdowns today. The hell?

This week we bid farewell to starting tailback LaMarcus Coker, kicked off the team at long damn last after an embarrassing string of drug test failures. Happy trails, asshole.

Also, one of our announcers, who has never given any indication of being functionally retarded, just referred to helmets as “football hats”. I need to lie down.

Andrea: The 2007 Hawkeyes are the most bipolar team I think I have ever watched. In the first half, we couldn’t buy a first down. We looked awful. Jake Christensen looked like a scared little boy, much like he looks in EVERY first half. Then suddenly we came out of the locker room ready and rarin’ to go. Christensen ended the day with 300 yds and a TD; he spread it out nicely, as 4 receivers had 30+ yards receiving and our top two RBs each had at least 30 yards and TD. It was great. We now could very realistically beat Minnesota and Western Michigan and end up in a decent bowl game because Iowa travels well. Good for us!

TSW:

11 thoughts on “Pink Locker Room

  1. Go Blue indeed. In terms of 100 year anniversary games, that was one for the history books. Props to Sparty, little brother, for putting up a fight!

  2. TSW, don’t make me share my “cottage cheese is nightmare fuel” story again!

    And Metschick, by some strange stroke of luck, I do get ESPNU. But it wasn’t worth watching. I turned it on, and the score was Uconn 2 Rutgers 0. They started the game with a fucking saftey. I knew then it wasn’t going to be pretty. I watched Devils-Rangers instead, and even though my boys lost in a shootout, it was a very entertaining game, and a choice well made.

  3. This week we bid farewell to starting tailback LaMarcus Coker, kicked off the team at long damn last after an embarrassing string of drug test failures. Happy trails, asshole.

    Holly I was there in the flesh, representing you and other out-of-towners for HC, and all signs are pointing to the fact that the other 124 guys on the roster feel the same way.

    The walk-thru on Friday had some chipper damn athletes, even just a few hours after the announcement. Good for the them. “Happy trails, asshole” indeed.

  4. SA, as you do not live among them, never EVER feel a little bad for Sparty. Far too many of them run their mouths, claiming this will be their year, call Michigan fans arrogant, and talk about that the only good thing about Michigan is that it keeps the ugly girls out of State. And then, when Michigan beats them again, they accuse Michigan of being classless and arrogant all over again.

    So, do not feel bad for little brother, they got what they deserved.

  5. Leave my Jayhawks and their obese coach alone!

    Seriously. How can it be healthy for a man to weigh what Mangino does?

  6. Far too many of them run their mouths, claiming this will be their year, call Michigan fans arrogant, and talk about that the only good thing about Michigan is that it keeps the ugly girls out of State. And then, when Michigan beats them again, they accuse Michigan of being classless and arrogant all over again.

    This sounds eerily similar to the relationship between Mets & Yankees fans. With the Mets playing the role of Mich. State, obvs.

  7. Now, Yostal, Michigan fans do not deserve a halo, either. Present company excepted, I’ve known some fairly vainglorious Michigan fans. It’s a healthy State school rivalry and that’s what makes it so awesome.

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