Saturday Morning Hate Sex

Can it be we’re a month into the season already? That’s a lot of ticks on the scoreboard. A lot of swigs from smuggled flasks. A lot of stolen kisses in the quad, and a lot of notches on our bedposts from our Saturday morning purge romps.

Most of the Ladies’ teams had good outings, but Andrea’s Iowa Hawkeyes fell in a tooth-and-nail slugfest to Wisconsin…and two weeks later, it’s time to move past Florida and the throttling they handed down to my Tennessee Vols. Get comfy, boys, I’ll want to be on top for this.


First off (sorry), the Badgers. Their numbers aren’t stellar, but the boys are no great shakes themselves. Fitting, somehow.

Tyler Donovan, Wisconsin. 138 yards passing, 1 TD/1 INT.

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P.J. Hill, Wisconsin. 133 yards rushing.

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*sigh*…I suppose one has to heal, doesn’t one? Here we go:

Brandon James, Florida. 83 yard punt return. *cringe*

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Saving the best (for them) for last:

Percy Harvin, Florida. 75 yards rushing. 120 yards receiving…on four carries. I need a drink.

percy_harvin.jpg

Oh, and the son of a bitch can fly.

percy_harvin_fly.jpg

Here’s hoping I’m not back here next week banging some Georgia boy. While you’ve got the object of your loathing chained to the bedpost (be sure to poke some holes in the lid), how about a little light reading? The gentlemen of Kermit the Blog and Gabe Kaplan’s Stylist battle it out playground-style for your pleasure and amusement. Welcome to the weekend, y’all, and happy hunting.

9 thoughts on “Saturday Morning Hate Sex

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