Hump Day Hottie: Pitcher Stares

So you’re on deck. You’ve swung the bat a few times with the donut, you’ve tightened (and re-tightened) your batting gloves, you’ve tarred your bat and helmet up nice and good, and your kick-ass music is playing out across the ballpark as you step in to the batter’s box. You’re ready to do battle with that good-for-nothin’ pitcher… and then you see this:

Oh my sweet lord.

How the hell is a batter supposed to concentrate with that stare drilling down from the mound? Never mind the intimidation factor, a pitcher’s glare is flat out HOT. It is part predatory, part arrogance, part master craftsman; all testosterone, all serious – and it is undeniably sexy. And the piercing stare from a closer? Well, you might as well turn out the lights and go home, because it is GAME OVER. The intensity, the attitude, the single-minded focus… that glare says, “I am a man. I am here to do business. And I am about to rock your world.” Please, sir- may I have some more?

Try to resist the lineup of pitchers’ stares after the jump…


Cole Hamels, Philadelphia Phillies


Jake Peavy, San Diego Padres


Dustin McGowan, Toronto Blue Jays


Justin Verlander, Detroit Tigers


Chris Capuano, Milwaukee Brewers


Jon Garland, Chicago White Sox


Huston Street, Oakland A’s


Justin Germano, San Diego Padres


Boone Logan, Chicago White Sox


Josh Beckett, Boston Red Sox


Mike Mussina, New York Yankees


Kyle Lohse, Philadelphia Phillies


Barry Zito, San Francisco Giants


Jeff Suppan, Milwaukee Brewers


Dontrelle Willis, Florida Marlins


Noah Lowry, San Francisco Giants


Scott Proctor, Los Angeles Dodgers


Trevor Hoffman, San Diego Padres


Jonathan Papelbon, Boston Red Sox
Yes, he’s in here twice. That glare deserves a double shot.

This entry was posted in Hump Day Hottie, MLB, Texas Gal, thank you sir- may I have some more? by Texas Gal. Bookmark the permalink.

About Texas Gal

Pitched four years for the Philadelphia Athletics, and then played shortstop for seven years for the Montreal Expos. Taught Rickey Henderson to steal a base. Taught Nolan Ryan to throw a punch. Taught Mickey Mantle to drink a beer. Threw one seven-hitter and seven no-hitters. Wonderboy was my creation, and first Jobu shrine was in my locker. Often called "the next Dustin Pedroia". Always wear high socks and eyeblack. Prefer to slide headfirst.

28 thoughts on “Hump Day Hottie: Pitcher Stares

  1. I can’t find Cole intimidating. He glare just makes me melt inside.

    I wish more of these guys were hanging their tongues out, though. THAT is the best- goofy and serious at the same time. Thanks Huston ;)

    And HELLOOOO Noah Lowry. Why are you still a Giant? I thought I asked you to give yourself to the Phillies? Maybe next year? Ok.

  2. No Billy Wagner? MC, what happened?

    These are Texy’s choices. But, Billy is of course a great candidate to be up here.

  3. Mal, I’m with you. Cole is too cute to be intimidating.

    I know he was once of the evil empire, but I always found Andy Pettite’s stare over the glove to be smoking, make-me-melt-off-my-couch hot.

  4. All of these are lovely…*swoon* But, as much as it pains me to agree with a Mets fan (Metschick), this list is not complete without Andy Pettitte’s “grrr” face. Need proof? Check this out: ( http://yankeeschick.mlblogs.com/yankees_fans_are_the_true/images/pettite.jpg ) Also, I’d like to propose a candidate for the next Hump Day Hottie – Neal Cotts (pitcher, ChiCubs). And yeah, Papelbon really creeps me out – does he even have any eyelashes?

  5. I just…He…God, Cole looks good.
    And I know this is inappropriate but…If Huston gave me that look, I would have no choice but to straddle his face on the mound. C’MON NOW.

  6. Metchick, I’m in total agreement:

    “I don’t like him at all, but this isn’t complete without Andy Pettitte’s glare.

    It’s pretty awesome.”

    It’s the sexiest thing ever. And I’m not even a Yankees fan!

  7. so Jonathon Papelbon is without a doubt one of the greatest closers, but does anybody else realize HE IS A TOOL?!?!?!?!?! HOW CORNY CAN YOU GET?!?!? Seriously,I know of Sox fans who get embarrassed by his interviews. I can’t even stand to hear his voice! He is the gayest heterosexual on this earth!

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